The Ballad Of Mona Lisa
by PurpleHipposRock
Summary: Song fic. When one of their own is murdered, the team is determined to get revenge, no matter what it takes. But how much is too much? I couldn't resist, there's a touch of 'Densi' in there... Ok, so more than a touch. The song is by Panic! At The Disco.
1. Chapter 1

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Song Fic**

**I don't own NCIS:LA or Panic! At The Disco or **_**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**_**...**

**Chapter 1**

'_She paints her fingers with a close precision_

_He starts to notice empty bottles of gin...'_

Kensi, with her tongue between her teeth and concentrating fiercely, her feet curled up underneath her on the couch as she put the finishing touches on her long, red fingernails, smiling at the deep, wine red, shiny coat. She spared a glance up at the television which was showing an episode of The Glee Project. She loved reality TV and loved Glee - what could be a better combination?

Finally satisfied with her nails - they were pretty, yet not long and cumbersome enough to inhibit her efficiency with a gun, she sat back and watched the rest of her show, slowly sipping her beer and quietly singing along with the songs she knew with a smile on her face.

And she woke up to the buzzing of her cell phone.

Opening one bleary eye, and then the other, the television cast a blue, flickering light over her, a dull fuzz of noise reaching her ears. A few empty beer bottles sat on the coffee table next to a half eaten bowl of Cheetos and a bottle of red nail varnish.

She reached for her phone, finding it easily from the lit-up screen, and flipped it open. 'OPS. Briefing thirty minutes. Eric.' She groaned and rested back against the couch before swinging her feet to the ground.

Her phone buzzed again, signalling another incoming text. She flipped the phone open again and read the text. 'Want a lift? Deeks.' She smiled. Deeks knew that she'd have gone home and had a few drinks after the day that they'd had. He had probably a _better_ way of dealing with things like that. Take the dog out for a long, long walk until he'd thought everything out so thoroughly that there was nothing to think about, exhaust them both and then conk out.

'Sure. Thx.' Kensi texted back.

He shot one back. '10 mins. C U.'

She smiled and got up off of the couch before stretching and pulling her messy, sleep mussed hair into a somewhat neat ponytail and shaking crumples out of the clean skinny jeans hanging over the arm of the couch and putting them on after pulling off her comfortable pyjama pants. She pulled on her high heeled boots which always made her feel kick-ass, even if they weren't terrifically functional. She wandered into her room and found a clean white button-up shirt and put it on over her red camisole, not bothering to button it up. She found her black leather jacket and slipped it on, sliding her gun into the holster concealed beneath the jacket. She stepped into the bathroom and brushed her teeth quickly before splashing cold water onto her face to wake herself up, only to reapply the day-old make-up she'd just washed off.

And then there was a tap on the door.

'Right on time,' Kensi muttered, checking her watch and opening the door after checking through the window. 'Hey.'

'Hey.' Deeks smiled at her, taking in her slap-dash, tangled pony, perfect wine-red nails, matching crimson lips and long, black, mascara covered lashes brushing her cheeks when she blinked. 'Ready?'

She grabbed her phone from the shelf beside her and slipped it into her pocket before stepping outside into the moonlight and locking the door behind her. 'Yeah.'

He got into the car and she followed, sliding into the passenger seat.

'What time is it?' Kensi asked.

Deeks blinked at her. 'How much did you have to drink?'

She rolled her eyes at him. 'Only a few bottles of beer.'

'How many is a few?'

'Three.'

Deeks just kept driving.

'Four.'

Deeks chuckled. 'See what I did there?'

'Oh, trust me, I did.' Kensi prayed that he wouldn't go there.

A paused, and then 'Hey, Kens, are you okay?' He went there.

She sighed. 'I'm good.'

'You purposely didn't say fine,' Deeks said with a growl. 'Seriously, Kensi-'

'Deeks. Will you for once in your life believe me that I'm fine? Really and truly?'

Deeks sighed.

'Hey, I don't go around asking you whether you're okay or not,' Kensi said defensively.

'I care about you.'

'I care about you. I don't go asking if you're fine all the time.'

'Maybe you should.'

'Maybe I shouldn't because I know that it's _annoying_.'

Deeks pulled up into the OSP and looked at her. 'I _know_ it's annoying, but I do it because I care about you. You know that, right?'

Kensi sighed and let her fingers brush the back of his hand in a simple, sympathetic touch. 'I know. Thank you. But you shouldn't worry so much. Okay?'

He grabbed her hand and squeezed it before letting it go. 'I'm not gonna stop. And I know you're not fine.'

'Ugh.' Kensi rolled her eyes and got out of the car. 'Come on, Deeks.'

Deeks sighed. That was as far as he ever got.

He got out of the car and locked it before running to catch up with his partner. 'Do you know what this is about?'

Kensi shook her head. 'I doubt we'd get called in at... 4 a.m. in the morning for a simple murder. It must be something pretty big.'

They walked into the OSP and into the bullpen, which was empty. A half-drunk mug of coffee sat still steaming on Callen's desk. A duffel gym bag sat on Sam's desk.

'I guess everyone's upstairs,' Deeks said.

Kensi draped her jacket over her chair and began to make her way to the OSP Centre. 'I guess.' She began to trudge up the stairs.

Voices could be heard filtering out the door of the darkened room, and Kensi and Deeks walked in, side by side.

'Mr Deeks. Miss Blye. Glad you could make it.' Hetty's tone was tense and cold, something that wasn't heard often.

'What's up?' Kensi asked, taking her spot at the table in between Callen and Deeks. Sam looked as tired as any normal person would at four in the morning, but Callen looked as wide awake as if it were a more normal time.

'There's been a fire,' Eric said, pulling up some footage of a burning building.

'Where?' Deeks asked. He didn't understand why they had been called in at four in the morning for a simple fire.

'I'm sure that you're all familiar with Agent Sara Murphy?'

Kensi, Callen and Sam all nodded, but Deeks shook his head. 'No. Who is she?'

'An NCIS agent,' Eric said, pulling up a picture of a lean woman with black hair and a friendly smile. 'Her house caught fire at approximately 3:48 this morning. Remains have been found in the house.'

'Oh, God,' Kensi said, paling. 'Hers?'

'Her ID on the table, her gun in the safe, her car in the garage. It's pretty safe bet-'

'But we're not taking anything to chance,' Hetty interrupted Callen.

'I was _about_ to say that,' Callen muttered.

'Because this is one of our own,' Hetty continued as if Callen hadn't spoken.

'And no-one kills a cop and gets away with it, right?' Deeks asked.

Hetty nodded. 'Exactly. It's horrible even if it's a normal human being, but there's _definitely_ no getting away with it when this is a law enforcement professional and one of our own.'

Callen nodded. 'Okay, the fire's been put out by now, hasn't it?' he asked, turning to Hetty.

Hetty nodded. 'Yes, Mr Callen.'

'Okay, Kensi, Deeks, you head over to the scene, find out what you can,' Callen said.

Kensi nodded tersely and moved out of the room, Deeks on her heels.

'Eric, Nell, pull all the records off of Murphy's computer,' Callen continued. The two nodded and began clacking away at their keyboards, neither speaking but the resolution strong. Whoever did this was _not_ going to get away due to bad work on their part.

'And what are you and Mr Hanna going to do, Mr Callen?' Hetty asked.

Callen sighed. 'What we do best, Hetty. Figure out what the hell happened here.'

**Well, what do you think? Let me know through a review. And please tell me about **_**any**_** mistakes, word misuses or things you think ought to happen.**

**And definitely check out this song. 'The Ballad of Mona Lisa' by Panic! At The Disco. It's awesome.**

**PurpleHipposRock!**


	2. Chapter 2

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**I don't own NCIS:LA or Panic! At The Disco, or this song...**

**Chapter 2**

'_And takes a moment to assess the sins she's paid for...'_

'Did you know her very well?' Deeks asked in the thick silence of the car.

Kensi shook her head. 'Not really. We worked a few cases, and I got the feeling that Callen knew her better than either of them were letting on, but I never asked, and she never told. All I know is that she's single, has two brothers, her parents are deceased and she's got no kids.'

'More than I knew.'

'You had an excuse for not really knowing her.'

Deeks shrugged. 'I've worked here for a year. You'd think I'd know _some_ people by now.'

'NCIS is a big agency. We're pretty close knit, but it's not hard to miss someone when they're good at being missed.'

'Missed?'

'She was a good operative. Slipped into anything anywhere anytime. Pretty damn good even by Callen's standards. They did a few undercovers together. Sold it. But she never put herself forward. She was always blending in, never standing out. You saw her. She was pretty, but she wasn't striking. She just blended in in this town.'

'Personally, I think all women are beautiful,' Deeks said. 'Mostly, they've all got something somewhere. Even if they're not the most beautiful, they've got gorgeous personalities, or a perfect aspect of their physique.'

'No wonder you flirt with every woman we come across if you continuously see the good in them,' Kensi said, rolling her eyes.

Deeks chuckled. 'Of course I flirt constantly. It makes you jealous.'

Kensi rolled her eyes. 'Oh, seriously?'

'I see how jealous you get sometimes, Fern.'

'Fern? Really? Reason #685 why I'm not jealous.'

'There are #685 reasons why you're not jealous? You must be jealous, Kiki, if you've given it _that_ much thought.'

Kensi rolled her eyes, and not for the first time wondered if you could hurt something by doing it as many times a day as she did.

'Come on, Deeks, let's get out there.' Kensi pulled the car up by the sidewalk.

'Never thought you'd ask.'

Kensi fought off the urge to roll her eyes yet again. What was this, the third or the fourth time today and the sun hadn't even risen yet?

'So, Deeks, if you flirt with _me_ then you must see something good in me,' Kensi said suddenly.

'Did I ever flirt with you?' Deeks asked, his eyes going wide in surprise at the thought.

'Oh, come on, you've been flirting since the day we met.'

'I don't recall flirting with you in the gym.'

'The gym doesn't count. You weren't you and I wasn't me.'

Deeks chuckled. 'If you'd managed to sell your cover a little better, I might've. But seriously, Zuna never would've picked up a girl as hot as you.'

'So you think I'm hot?' Kensi asked, pouncing.

Deeks smiled and shook his head ruefully. 'There's not a guy on this planet that wouldn't admit that you're easy on the eyes.'

Kensi smiled sunnily. 'Thank you, Deeks.'

'You're welcome, Fern.'

'Ugh! You had to ruin the compliment, didn't you?'

'Of course I did. You're my partner. It's just awkward, complimenting your partner.'

'Is it?'

'Well, yes, because you've definitely never complimented me. Or Callen, or Sam for that matter.'

'Yes, but that's because you're _you_.'

Deeks winced. 'Ouch, Kensi. A shot to the heart. Or maybe lower, considering that it's you.'

Kensi smiled. 'Fine. I'll compliment you. You have a decent sense of humour.'

'You have to in this job. I call it appreciating the irony.'

'And now you're taking this _way_ too far. Federal Agents.' Kensi showed her badge to the uniformed police officer at the crime scene tape who nodded and let her and Deeks duck under.

'That's lying, you know,' Deeks said after yawning widely. He didn't like getting up at four in the morning, whether because he needed to for security reasons or for work reasons. 'I'm only LAPD.'

'Only because you knocked Hetty back.' Kensi was the only person that he'd told about Hetty's offer, and only because she'd noticed that he was acting weirder than usual (her words, not his). 'You could be avenging this agent's death for a reason, you know, Deeks.'

Deeks smiled at his partner. 'Can we not go into this? It's much too early.'

'Sure.' Kensi walked up to a man who seemed to be in charge of the circus which was trampling, elephants and all, over their crime scene. 'You in charge here?' She showed him her badge.

The man nodded. 'Detective Harvey. Thought you lot might turn up.'

'Well, it _is_ one of ours.' Kensi folded her arms.

Harvey just nodded.

'Is this how you'd run a crime scene, Deeks?' Kensi asked Deeks, turning away slightly from Harvey.

She didn't miss how Deeks' jaw tightened at the sight of the other man. 'This is how I'd run a circus actually. But a really bad one.'

'Yeah, yeah, that's what I was thinking too,' Kensi replied, sending him a glance which said _we'll talk later_. 'This how LAPD teaches detectives to run a crime scene?'

Deeks shook his head. 'At least, they didn't teach it like this when they taught me. This how they taught you, Harvey?'

'This is how I run an accidental death investigation,' Harvey said before pressing his lips together tightly. It was obvious that Kensi and Deeks had gotten under his skin with their comments.

'Nothing accidental about it. I want _everyone_ out,' Kensi declared.

Everyone within earshot (and that was an impressive circumference) went awfully quiet.

'What?' Harvey asked.

'As of this moment, NCIS is taking over this crime scene and this investigation. You and your people can leave now. As in, right now. And they can leave behind _all_ evidence that they have collected.'

All the techs and policemen walked off of the scene, grumbling and collecting their things before dumping their evidence in unceremonious and untidy piles.

Harvey's eyes flashed with anger. 'Your boss will be hearing about this.'

Kensi smiled. 'I'm sure she'll be delighted.'

'And you, Deeks?' Harvey stepped closer to him, but Deeks didn't back down. 'I'm sure this one's even better in bed than Jess.'

Deeks' eyes widened in anger, but before he could even react, Harvey was on the ground and groaning.

Kensi flicked her hair out of her eyes with a proud toss over her head, and Deeks smiled over at her. This was one situation where he could appreciate a good strong kick to the nuts and agree that it was justified. Someone else's, of course.

'You'll think twice before saying that again,' Deeks said hoarsely, and as one, the pair turned and walked away.

'You think I'll get in trouble for that?' Kensi asked, letting Deeks go into the badly carbonised house before her.

Deeks shrugged. 'I'll vouch for that fact that it was justified.'

'Justified?' Kensi snorted. 'It was low.'

Deeks smiled. 'Thanks for having my back, though, partner.'

Kensi shrugged. 'Hey, next time you need a guy kicked so hard that he sings soprano, just give me a call.'

'I'm sure that you can use the practise,' Deeks agreed. 'After all, practise makes perfect.'

'Exactly,' Kensi agreed. 'Wow.'

'Looks like a bomb went off in here,' Deeks said, looking around the room.

Kensi nodded her agreement and then whistled as she examined the floor. 'Accidental death my ass.'

'You have a very nice ass,' Deeks said.

Kensi gave into temptation and rolled her eyes. 'Pour patterns. Accelerants were obviously used.'

'What type?' Deeks asked.

'My guess?'

'Well, unless you did it, you can't be certain just yet, can you?' Deeks asked.

Kensi rolled her eyes. 'I'm thinking gasoline. Can you smell it?'

Deeks sniffed. 'Now that you mention it...'

She nodded. 'This was no accident. Murphy was murdered.'

**Please review. That's all I ask... XD**


	3. Chapter 3

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**I don't own any of it... *sigh*...**

**Chapter 3**

'_A lonely speaker in a conversation,_

_Her words are swimming through his ears again...'_

'That was Kensi,' Callen said, hanging up his phone. 'She's not one hundred percent certain, but she's pretty sure that Murphy's death wasn't an accident. She and Deeks found pour patterns.'

'Pour patterns?' Sam asked absently.

'An accelerant was used,' Callen said.

'Oh,' Sam said, typing into the database. 'Hey, I found what Murphy was looking into at the time of her death.'

'Case?' Callen asked.

'Yeah,' Sam confirmed. 'Drug ring on the _Lincoln_. Three people have been in the bay because of withdrawal. Simple stuff.'

'_Lincoln_ got into port yesterday,' Callen said.

Sam looked at him. 'You thinking that her murder might have something to do with this?'

Callen shrugged. 'It's as good a lead as any. Are there any notes in the file? Anything about who might be involved.'

Sam shook his head. 'No, just the names of the men who were hospitalised because of the drugs.'

Callen sighed grimly. 'Well, let's go talk to them.'

'Special Agent Hanna.' Sam held up his badge.

The man in the bed, Petty Officer Paul Lite was as pale as the sheets surrounding him, but he still managed to sit up. 'Sir? Where's Agent Murphy?'

'I'm sorry to inform you, but Agent Murphy died about two hours ago.'

Lite paled even further, if that were possible.

'Died? As is dead?'

'As in dead,' Sam confirmed.

'Oh, man. She was so nice.'

'That she was,' Sam replied.

'Oh, I'm sorry, man. You're NCIS too, aren't you?'

Sam nodded.

'Gees, man, I'm sorry for your loss.'

Sam nodded again. 'What can you tell me about the drug ring?'

Lite groaned. 'Oh, man, that's sh... stupid. Can't you just, I don't know, look at Agent Murphy's notes or something?'

'By the looks of things, her only notes were destroyed in the fire, and the ones that have been recovered or found are either badly burnt or indecipherable. What did Murphy ask you about?'

'How we got the drugs.'

'And how did you?'

'You call a number, place a coded order - like pepperoni pizza is code for coke, right? - and two hours later, you pick it up from a spot. Never the same spot twice.'

'The number?'

Lite gave it to him.

'Anything else?'

'She asked me if anything had ever been wrong.'

'Wrong?'

'Yeah, like they asked for more money than we agreed, or they tried to blackmail me or anything like that.'

'Had they?'

'Well, last time, two guys did the delivering instead of only one. And both were armed. They're never usually armed, but that day they were. Said that they were expecting trouble. You see, last time I picked the stuff up, the other Petty Officer, the first one to get caught, the one that died from the stuff that was off, he'd died about two days before. But I only heard about the bad stuff _after_ I used the stuff that I'd got and I panicked and got my sorry ass delivered to hospital just in case. I use the stuff to get high - not to die.'

'Well, if you don't want to die, you'd be better off just not using at all.'

Lite smiled grimly. 'Oh, trust me, dude, I've learned my lesson. I'm going clean from now on.'

'That's good, Marine. Thanks for your time.' Sam took out a calling card and placed it on the bed side table. 'You remember anything, you call me, day or night, okay?'

'Yes sir.' Lite picked it up. 'Hers was just like this... I don't suppose I need it anymore.'

Sam nodded grimly. 'Bye.'

'Bye.'

Callen met Sam outside the hospital, and they compared notes.

'Both boys are telling the same story,' Callen said.

Sam nodded. 'Kid seemed pretty shocked that Murphy was dead.'

'My kid was sorry and asked when the memorial was. Turns out, Murphy got the kid to the hospital just as he was crashing. He would've died if it weren't for her.'

Sam shook his head. 'Damn pity she's gone.'

Callen nodded in agreement. 'Well, I think that's all the information that we're gonna get for the moment.'

Sam nodded. 'Let's get back to OSP.'

Hetty looked grim as she stood over a nervous Kensi and Deeks (figuratively) when Callen and Sam walked in.

'What's happened?' Callen asked in a low voice.

Sam shrugged. 'Do I look like a mind reader?'

Callen shook his head.

'Were such actions _necessary_?' Hetty asked the two younger members of the team.

'They seemed justifiable at the time,' Kensi offered.

'And your rudeness towards Detective Harvey?'

'Harvey was pretty damn rude to us,' Deeks said, stumbling to a halt when Hetty turned her icy glare into him. 'Hetty,' he added belatedly.

'What exactly happened?' Hetty asked.

Callen and Sam took their seats in the bullpen.

'Harvey was running the crime scene completely wrong. He was compromising and tainting evidence, _he_ thought that this whole thing was an accident and everyone was just trampling over the scene.' Kensi seemed annoyed.

'And thus you kicked LAPD off of the scene?' Hetty asked.

'Well, not me,' Deeks said.

Kensi almost rolled her eyes, and then remembered where she was. 'Yes.'

'And then you and Detective Harvey exchanged words,' Hetty said slowly.

Kensi nodded. 'Not really. I told him that NCIS was taking over the investigation and that he and his men could leave.'

'In those exact terms?' Hetty asked.

Kensi and Deeks looked at each other, and Callen and Sam knew that they knew that they had been caught.

'Maybe that was a loose summary of the conversation,' Deeks finally allowed.

Hetty's lips thinned to the point of non-existence. 'And then Miss Blye, you attacked Harvey.'

'Just _one_ kick,' Kensi said pleadingly.

Callen and Sam exchanged a glance. They knew exactly where the kick had been placed.

'Unprovoked?' Hetty asked. 'Because that's the feeling I was getting from Detective Harvey.'

'Unprovoked? Hetty, I would never attack someone unprovoked, you know that,' Kensi defended herself.

Hetty allowed herself a brief smile. 'Yes, I know that much. So what provoked you so much that an attack seemed justifiable?'

'He... he...' Kensi mumbled the rest.

'He what?' Hetty asked.

Callen and Sam hadn't caught that either.

Deeks broke back into the conversation. 'He asked me if Kensi was as good as Jess in bed.' His blue eyes betrayed his otherwise cool countenance.

Hetty allowed herself a short, almost inaudible gasp. 'Well then, _I_ feel that the attack was justified.'

Callen and Sam smiled, and Kensi and Deeks relaxed.

'However,' Hetty began, 'in the future, I'd prefer it if our dealings with the LAPD were somewhat more calmly handled, and I'd most definitely prefer it if you avoided all dealings with Harvey.'

'You and me both,' Deeks muttered, still stinging over having to repeat the offensive comment.

'Well, then?' Hetty asked the team. 'Don't we have a murderer to catch? After all, we have to get a conviction to prove our Mr Harvey wrong.'

**Reviews. Lots and lots and lots of reviews. That's what makes me tick. And write more.**


	4. Chapter 4

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**One day I will own them... I asked the plot bunnies... Plot bunnies are like Santa Claus, right?**

**Chapter 4**

"_There's nothing wrong with just a taste of what you paid for..."_

'What else did you get from the scene?' Callen asked the other pair as they slunk back to their seats with tails (metaphorically) between their legs.

'Photos.' Kensi plugged an SD card into a reader on the side of computer and pulled them up. 'Murphy was in bed at the time.'

'What did the ME say?' Sam asked.

'That she was dead before she burned,' Deeks offered.

Hetty let out a sigh. 'That's a relief. I've had other agents go out in pain... I couldn't bear the thought of another.'

Callen nodded. 'And being burnt isn't the most merciful way to go. How did she die?'

'GSW to the head. Painless and quick. I can only hope for the same thing when my time comes,' Deeks said glumly.

'Which won't be for a long time if I have any say in the matter,' Kensi said firmly, and Callen and Sam almost felt as if they were intruding when they saw the looks the two were sharing, a very private moment.

'I hope _none_ of you go out like that,' Hetty said firmly.

They both nodded, neither looking away but yet neither really looking at each other.

'And I sure hope I'm recognisable when it happens,' Callen said a bit more jovially than the moment called for.

'I think we'll have to give you a closed casket funeral, G,' Sam said, also seeking to lighten the moment, but the morbid humour falling flat in the tension-filled room. 'No-one likes looking at you alive, what're they gonna do when you're dead?'

Callen forced a snort but the room was as awkward as ever.

'Oh, for goodness... Kensi-'

But at the same time that Callen said 'Kensi' Sam spoke Deeks' name aloud, and the two merged into a sort of 'Densi' or 'Keeks'.

'Did you just call us Densi?' Kensi asked.

'Or Keeks?' Deeks asked, folding his arms.

'We called you Kensi and Deeks,' Sam said, looking amused at the thought of 'Densi' and 'Keeks'. 'But those are good names for you two.'

'Don't even think about it,' Deeks and Kensi said together in a way that just made the nicknames suit them even more.

Callen grinned broadly. 'Densi, go check out Murphy's office. There might be some notes there, or something.'

Both protesting at the nickname, they walked away, Deeks letting Kensi go out first and then following on her heels.

Hetty smiled. 'And you two?'

'We're gonna go see if Eric and Nell have got anything,' Callen said.

'Neric,' Sam said thoughtfully.

Callen glanced over at him with a slightly nauseated expression on his face.

'Too much?' Sam asked.

Callen nodded. 'Too much. Let's just stick with Densi.'

'Or Keeks.'

'Whichever really suits them,' Callen joked as he followed Sam up the staircase.

Hetty smiled to herself. 'Whatever helps them cope.'

Deeks watched as Kensi ate another Twinkie before slamming his door shut.

'How many of those can you eat in one day?' he asked.

Kensi shrugged. 'Dunno.'

'You've never counted?'

'Why?'

'I dunno. A food diary?'

'Why would I keep a diary of what I eat?'

'To lose weight?'

'Are you suggesting something, Deeks?' Kensi asked, a dangerous edge to her voice.

Deeks shuddered and grew aware that he was stomping on thin ice. 'Never. You're perfect, Kensi. Absolutely perfect.'

And there was something in _his_ voice that made her blush and then mentally kick herself for blushing. This was _Deeks_ after all.

'I'd better be,' she replied, tossing the wrapper into the back of the car.

'No, offense, you're perfect to look at, but you're an absolute slob everywhere else.'

'I'm just gonna remember the compliment part of that sentence and ignore the rest,' Kensi said, starting the car and buckling her seatbelt.

'Good,' Deeks said, before mumbling under his breath, 'I doubt my boys could take it.'

'I heard that,' Kensi smiled, starting the car and looking out of her window.

'It's another compliment,' Deeks said quickly.

'I would hope so,' Kensi smirked, pulling away from the curb.

'Oh, Fern, you know that I would never make a comment about you that wasn't a compliment,' Deeks said, sending one of his best smiles her way.

She glanced into the rear-view mirror and caught a full blast of him, eyes shiny and blue and sincere and a sweet, crooked smile that just begged to be stopped with a well placed kiss. Quickly, she looked away before she did just that.

'So, um, Murphy,' she stumbled, signalling a left turn.

'Yeah. Why did she have an office away from the Mission?' Deeks asked.

'We've got another office across town.'

'Why don't I know about that?'

'Because it's our backup plan. If the Mission gets compromised, that's where everyone who hasn't been compromised flees.'

'What about the boathouse?'

Kensi shook her head. 'I think someone would notice if hundreds of people flooded the marina and visited _one_ specific boat.'

'Good point. So, where's this mysterious secondary location?'

'Wouldn't you like to know?'

'That's kind of why I'm asking.'

Kensi smiled. 'I'm not even sure if you should even know about this place. I think I've made a mistake even just telling you about it.'

'Oh, come on, Kens, I'm basically only a quarter LAPD nowadays. You know where my loyalties lie.'

Kensi really did. He'd taken bullets for her - no, not her, NCIS. He took them because of his connection to her through NCIS. He wouldn't take bullets for her. She knew that he didn't care that much. But seeing as he had taken the bullets for NCIS, she probably could tell him about the secondary location.

'Why would you need to know about it?' she asked.

'What if I'm at the LAPD and you're at the Mission and the Mission is compromised? How would I know that you're safe?' Deeks asked, putting on puppy-dog eyes.

Kensi sighed. 'Well, I suppose you'll figure out where we are when we get there, anyway, and I can't be bothered blindfolding you.'

Deeks chuckled. 'You'd like to get me in bondage.'

Kensi pulled the car over to the curb and closed her eyes briefly. 'That's an image I want to block out, and soon.'

'Hang on, this is the FBI building,' Deeks said, looking around.

Kensi smiled. 'Actually, numerous agencies operate out of this building. See?' She motioned to the sign. It said, _FBI, Homeland Security, DOD._

'NCIS isn't on that sign,' Deeks said.

'Well, we don't really want to advertise our secondary location, do we?'

'Good point.' Deeks followed as Kensi went _around_ the building. 'Hang on. Where are we going?'

'Because NCIS doesn't have an official place in the building, they're not in the most conventional spot.' Kensi went around the back of the apartment block and hauled open a metal mesh security door. 'Go on.'

Deeks frowned. 'Are you sure?'

Kensi smiled. 'Very.'

'Are you very, very sure?'

'Yes, I'm sure.'

'I can't help but feel not quite safe,' Deeks said, ducking his head to fit under the low walkway.

Kensi grinned toothily. 'Hey, you signed up for this. Deal with it.'

**Deeks better hope that Kensi knows where she's going, right? Anyways, same deal. You review, I'm happy. I'm happy, I write more. Even just three words would be nice. Two? **

**Next chapter will be up soon. = )**


	5. Chapter 5

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Of course I don't own them. When I'm a billionaire, though, that will definitely change.**

**Chapter 5**

'_Say what you mean,_

_Tell me I'm right_

_And let the sun rain down on me...'_

'Okay, you are _sure_ that you know where you're going?' Deeks asked, stumbling over an uneven patch of ground.

'For the seventh time, yes,' Kensi said, rolling her eyes.

'No, really, this isn't a practical joke or something?' Deeks asked.

'_Yes_,' Kensi said, very quickly losing patience.

'Yes, this _is_ a practical joke?'

'_No_.' Kensi's shoes were hurting her.

'You mean that NCIS's secondary location in LA is really in the basement of the FBI?'

'Well, how much safer can you get?' Kensi asked.

Deeks shrugged. 'Not much.'

'Exactly, and it's only the Office of Special Projects,' Kensi said, limping a little.

'Are your feet hurting you?' Deeks asked, watching as she made a little, hobbling skip.

'You try wearing pumps for a day and then answer that question,' Kensi said.

'I think I'll pass on that particular challenge,' Deeks replied.

'Good choice,' Kensi said, pausing for a moment to rest her foot.

'You wanna take your shoes off?' Deeks asked, his tone not quite gentle but not far off of it.

Kensi shook her head. 'I've made worse entrances into here, but I think I'll pass.'

'Your loss.'

'I'll just borrow something from wardrobe here. This is still Hetty's domain, so I doubt she'll mind much.'

'Much?' Deeks asked warily.

'Oh, it'll all be on me, don't worry,' Kensi said, airily waving a hand.

'Until you get grumpy, and then it's on me too.' Deeks seemed resigned to his fate.

'Oh, look, we're here.'

'Finally,' Deeks grumbled. He could hear the familiar hum of conversation.

'The journey gets shorter each time you do it,' Kensi assured him.

'Let's hope I never walk it wondering whether or not you're okay,' Deeks said grimly, following as Kensi pushed open a wood door on swinging piano hinges that reminded him of the one that he'd travelled through often during his short time as a busboy in an Italian restaurant when he was sixteen.

They stepped out into a dimly lit open space, and Deeks looked on in amazement as Kensi let out a yell of happiness. 'Nate?'

The tall man's dark head turned sharply at the sound of her voice and beamed. 'Kensi.'

Deeks followed his partner as she made her way to the psychologist.

'I didn't know that you were in town,' Kensi said, folding her arms and raising an eyebrow, but giving the game away with a smile that Deeks could label with no other word than 'adorable'.

'I only got in this morning.' Nate let out a wide yawn.

'From God knows where,' Kensi said grudgingly.

'Need to know, Kens. You can't.'

Kensi nodded resignedly.

'Detective.' Nate nodded to Deeks.

'Psychologist,' Deeks replied, a twinkle in his eye.

Nate chuckled. 'Been awhile.' The last time he'd seen the detective had been the first time he'd met him, just before Deeks had been labelled a 'temp' and thrown into his first and only full case with the team before being whisked away back to the LAPD for an undercover that had cost him his partner and almost his life.

'Yup.' Deeks seemed almost reluctant to give much away to the taller man.

'How've you been? I heard about what happened with Kensi and the relocated witnesses? You better?' One of Nate's precious visits Stateside with Hetty had been thoroughly disjointed through the fact that she was extremely worried about her liaison, and snatched up the phone every time it rang, hoping for news.

Deeks gave a stiff nod. 'Yeah. Holes heal.'

Nate nodded and gestured to his arm, which was in a sling. 'I sure hope so.'

'Oh, the novelty wears off after the first few holes,' Deeks assured the psychologist. 'And it definitely wears off when you start feeling like Swiss cheese.'

'As long as the mice stay away, I think I'll be okay,' Nate quipped.

Deeks made a face. 'Never been fond of mice.'

'Me neither,' Nate said.

'What happened?' Kensi asked.

'The job. What else, Kens?' Nate asked.

'Still need to know,' Kensi said regretfully.

Watching her out of the corner of his eye, Deeks could see that she was also slightly annoyed, as though the fact that now the person that she'd spilled all of her secrets to was now withholding information from her.

'And I don't,' she concluded, Deeks could swear almost sadly, if he didn't know her better.

'Ah, get used to it, Kens,' Nate said good-naturedly. 'You did it to me all the time.'

'What are you doing here, Nate?' Deeks asked, seeking to lift the tension of the moment.

'Well, we lost one of our own, didn't we?' Nate asked. 'Hetty thought that I was more needed here than... wherever I may or may not have been.'

Kensi's eyes narrowed and she pressed her lips together. 'You're here to shrink us?'

Nate dipped his head in a nod. 'Mm-hmmm. You guys must be fighting some major-league personal demons right now. I know I feel pretty despondent and down-hearted right now.'

'Really?' Deeks asked, humour lightening his tone slightly. 'Major league personal demons and despondent and down-hearted in the same sentence?'

'Oh, Kens knows how I feel about the technical terms.'

'Well, I know how she feels about technical terms full stop. I just have to mention the phrase 'beyond reasonable doubt'-'

'Oh, be quiet, Deeks,' Kensi snapped.

Deeks did her bidding, but raised his brows in a way that suggested that he was still saying to Nate 'You see?'

Nate chuckled.

'I'm going to get some decent shoes,' Kensi grumbled, stalking away, limping slightly in her pumps.

Deeks joined in the laughter with a low chortle.

'I see you two are getting on quite fine,' Nate said once the laughter had stopped.

'Yeah, it started out a little rocky, and me getting into some pretty unpleasant situations with LAPD didn't help, especially when they had to ride to my rescue after months of not seeing me, so we've had a fairly interesting time, but we're getting there.' Deeks ran down from his sudden outburst and was a little nervous about what Nate had analysed from his part of the conversation.

But Nate said nothing to do with psychoanalysis. 'Yeah, I heard about the situation with the Russians, with Hetty and the little black book. I heard about what happened to you and Kensi.'

Deeks puffed out a breath of air through pursed lips. 'God, when I found her, I felt so ridiculously happy, and then it turned out that there was a bomb and lasers between us... it was like my heart sank into my shoes.'

'An apt description. But I was referring to how you tried to stop the Russians from taking Kensi, switching your positions and trying to make her seem less important so that they would take you.'

Deeks blinked and then shrugged. 'It's my job, you know, to protect my partner. If I have to do that by trying to get myself kidnapped in her place, then I will.'

'That's very valiant of you. And the time that you were shot? When there were people trying to get to you so that they could find the kid and his mother through Kensi?'

'Part of the job, man. I've been hurt a lot. You never get used to it, but, hey, as long as Kensi's safe, I'm good.'

'You ran down several flights of stairs, ripping open your stitches.'

Deeks shrugged. 'They heal.'

'I have trouble believing that you can shake that experience off so easily.'

'And _here's_ where the shrinking begins,' Deeks said

Nate chuckled. 'You don't seem to be comfortable with psychologists. Or is it just me?'

'Oh, trust me, doc, you're probably the least invasive psychologist I've ever had the non-pleasure of talking to,' Deeks said.

'I think that that was a compliment,' Nate said thoughtfully.

'Well, you're the psychologist,' Deeks said with a grin.

'I kind of walked into that, didn't I?' Nate asked, wincing.

'Just a little bit,' Deeks agreed.

'What did Nate walk into?' Kensi asked, returning in a pair of purple Converse.

'You look more comfortable,' Deeks said quickly.

'Extremely. Nate, what can you tell us about Murphy?'

Nate's eyes seemed to darken at the question. 'Well, I had the pleasure of working with her lately, and it seemed to me that she was fine. Until we had coffee a couple of days ago.'

'Come on, Doc, it's one of us,' Deeks said. 'Stop shrinking around the bush.'

Kensi sent him a glance.

'Hey, Hetty's said that I'm as close to one of you guys as anyone will ever get.'

She sighed. 'Nate, what are you not telling us?'

He smiled ruefully. 'You guys want to get something to drink? This could take awhile.'

**Hey, guys. **_**Major**_** twist coming, so get ready. As always, criticism is appreciated. Reviews are loved.**

**Special thank yous to lastnameleft, miley-avril & supernaturallover101. Thanks so much for your reviews.**

**PS Happy Birthday to supernaturallover101 – Congrats on your Sweet Sixteen, Dizzle…**

**XD 3 PurpleHipposRock **


	6. Chapter 6

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Still not mine. Neither of them. I'm starting to get a little sad. Frowny face... **

**Chapter 6**

'_Give me a sign,_

_I want to believe...'_

'Where're "Densi"?' Sam asked with a grin.

Callen smiled. 'At the back-up office taking a look at Murphy's desk and belongings there.'

'And, hopefully, talking to Mr Getz,' Hetty said, making another of her invisible entrances.

Callen jumped as he noticed the small 'ninja' woman behind him. 'One day you're going to have to show me how you do that,' he said to her.

'Nate's in town?' Sam asked.

'Only for the day, so if you feel the need to talk to someone, today's the day to do it. He's got to go back to his mission tonight.'

Callen frowned. 'Why does Densi have to speak to a psychologist?' he asked.

'G. Did you really just ask that about _them_?' Sam asked.

Callen thought about it for a moment. 'I see your point. Scratch that last comment, Hetty.'

'I wasn't making a particular note of this conversation, Mr Callen,' Hetty said in that arch way that somehow didn't offend people even though the words ought to.

'I s'pose you wouldn't,' Callen mumbled.

'What do we have, gentlemen?' Hetty asked.

'A murdered NCIS agent who was investigating a drug connection on the _Lincoln_, which docked yesterday. We've got three Petty Officers in hospital due to bad coke, one of whom Murphy saved from death. We've got Murphy's house literally in ashes and her body's not much better shape. Densi are searching her office for any notes or files she may have made on the investigation, because all they've found at the scene so far are just scraps of mostly burnt paper with a few recognisable words on them that aren't any help at all.'

A phone rang, and Callen picked it up. 'Callen. Whoa, calm down Rose. I can't understand you when you speak so fast. Are you okay?' He listened for a moment. 'Okay, that's good. What's happened?' He listened again, and his mouth dropped open in shock. 'Wha... are you sure?'

'Extremely positive,' could be heard.

'Okay, just sit tight and we'll do what we can.' He hung up.

'What's happened?' Sam asked.

Callen opened and shut his mouth a few times before making up his mind on what to say. 'Someone hijacked the ME's van, the one that had Murphy's body and it's now part of a major police chase. On the Interstate.'

Sam seemed stunned into silence.

'Well, gentlemen, I think you've got a chase to participate in,' Hetty said.

Both men just nodded, got up and walked away.

...

Deeks handed Kensi her coffee and two sugar packets, which was received with a smile. He picked his own up and sipped it black.

Nate smiled and took a mouthful of his own coffee.

'What?' Kensi asked.

'What?' Nate asked.

'You smiled. What were you smiling at?' Deeks asked.

Nate smiled again.

'You did it again,' Kensi exclaimed.

'Seriously, man, why are you smiling?' Deeks asked.

Nate chuckled. 'Sorry, it's just... something that Hetty said to me before I came back here. Something she told me to look out for.'

'Oh?' Kensi asked politely.

'Yeah,' Nate said, not giving anything away.

Deeks sighed. 'That's what happens when you try to get info from a shrink.'

'What can you tell us about Murphy, Nate?' Kensi asked.

'She and I met for coffee three days ago. She wanted to run something past me about her latest case,' Nate began.

'The one about the dirty drugs on the _Lincoln_?' Deeks asked.

Nate nodded. 'The exact one.'

'What about it?' Kensi asked.

'She had a theory that the NCIS agent afloat had something to do with this whole thing,' Nate said.

'A who now what now?' Deeks asked.

'NCIS agent afloat. An NCIS agent is assigned to a Navy ship for a certain assignment in case there are problems such as a drug ring.'

'So, Agent Murphy thought that this agent had something to do with the dirty drugs getting aboard the _Lincoln_?' Kensi asked.

Nate nodded.

'Well, who's the agent?' Deeks asked.

'She never said,' Nate replied.

'I'll call Eric,' Deeks said, stepping away from the table.

'So, how's it going?' Nate asked the moment Deeks was out of earshot.

'What do you mean?' Kensi asked, taking a mouthful of her drink.

'You and Deeks. Last time we spoke, it was a little bumpy.'

'It was the start, of course it was.'

'So, you'd call it better now?'

'Yeah,' Kensi said. 'We're fine.'

Nate opened his mouth to say something, familiar with Kensi's version of 'fine'.

'We're good. Better than good, even,' Kensi jumped in, cutting him off.

He smiled. 'You and he seem to be getting on well.'

'Yeah... we're starting to trust each other and get to know each other.'

'But you're scared.' Nate filled in the unsaid words.

'I'm not scared.'

Nate raised an eyebrow.

'I'm not scared of everything. I'm scared of losing him like I lost Dom... I'm scared of losing him without knowing him. I didn't really _know_ Dom. I didn't know how much family he had, whether he had a girlfriend or a partner, I barely know how he took his coffee.'

'What about Deeks?'

'We've tried. But I've found that you've gotta give some to get some. And I once remember you saying that I don't play well with others.'

Nate smiled. 'But you've tried.'

Kensi nodded. 'We're getting there.'

Deeks skidded into the room, his shoes not gaining traction on the floor. 'Fern!'

Nate looked at Kensi in confusion.

'Don't ask. I'd kick him explaining.'

'Callen called. Someone stole Murphy's body.'

...

Deeks muttered a curse under his breath as the momentum of the car threw him against the door. He grabbed the door handle to brace himself.

'Is this really necessary?' he asked.

'We got to cut them off,' Kensi replied.

'There! Look!' Deeks yelled, pointing.

A white van was shooting up the highway.

Kensi pulled out onto the highway, ploughing through a barrier and shooting straight across the lanes. She pulled the car in the lane in which the car was speeding up.

'Look, there's Callen and Sam,' Deeks said, pointing.

'Great,' said Kensi, slamming both feet onto the brakes.

Deeks braced himself against the dash.

'What the hell, Kensi?' he yelled. 'They're coming right at us!'

'That's kind of the point, Deeks.' Kensi pulled the keys out of the ignition.

'Kensi!' Deeks exclaimed, trying to snatch the keys from her swaying hand. The van was getting closer and closer.

Kensi locked eyes with him and then got out of the car, running to the middle of the road which was relatively less dangerous.

'Kensi!' He was screaming now.

'Deeks get out of the car!' she screamed back.

The van was almost upon him.

'Deeks!' Now it was Kensi's turn to panic.

She ran back to the car and tugged the door open.

'Come on!' Her scream made his ears hurt, but figuring that his partner had suddenly gone mad, he dove out of the car and she tugged him free just as the van plunged into Kensi's SRX.

The resulting fireball seared at Deeks' back as he covered the back of his head with his hands and winced at the pressure of the shockwave. Next to him, Kensi cried out and tried to protect herself from the blast, but it made little difference.

Panting, Deeks tilted his head up so that he could see her and sighed, resting his chin on his arms.

'Kens, if you wanted to get rid of me, you could've given me a more obvious sign!'

**Reviews please? I'll write more... Funny... I'm bribing you to bribe me... Something's wrong with that...**

**XD PurpleHipposRock **


	7. Chapter 7

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 7**

**Nope. **

'_Whoa... Mona Lisa, you're guaranteed to run this town,_

_Whoa... Mona Lisa, I'd pay to see you frown!'_

Deeks cracked a weak grin at her look of confusion and anger.

'What?' Kensi asked, her voice cracking.

'I mean, I know that I'm not your favourite person, but it's be nice to not have a death certificate that reads "death by collision with ME van". It's worse than pepper spray.'

'You thought you were going to die when you got sprayed with pepper spray?' Kensi asked.

Deeks chuckled wryly. 'You're on fire, Fern.'

Kensi narrowed her eyes. 'What? Are you trying to tell me something, Deeks?'

'Yeah, Kensi, you're on fire.'

'What?'

'Kensi, your hair's on fire!' Callen dashed towards her and grabbed her head, trying to pat out the flames.

Sam slid off his jacket and engulfed her head and most of her body in the cloth, using it to smother the flames.

Kensi's muffled squeaks came through the clothing in outraged bursts as she wriggled slightly.

'Calm down, Kens, it's us,' Callen said calmly, patting where her shoulder should've been underneath Sam's giant jacket.

Kensi stopped struggling slightly and pushed the jacket away from her upper body before folding her arms.

'What happened here?' Sam asked Deeks, who was gingerly poking an angry burn on his leg where his jeans had been burnt away.

'Kensi's really bad at parking,' was all Deeks said.

Kensi reached out blindly and got hold of Deeks' ankle. He jumped and cried out in pain.

'Deeks?' Kensi asked, her voice muffled. 'Was that you?'

'I think I twisted my ankle when you pulled me out of the car,' Deeks replied.

'Sam, I think that the fire's out now,' was the next thing that Kensi said.

'Meaning that she's suffocating, guys,' Deeks translated.

'Oh, sorry,' Callen said, pulling the immense jacket that was more like a tent on her off of her body.

'Thanks,' Kensi panted, shaking her head. Locks of burnt off hair fell to the ground. 'Shit.'

'Time for a hair cut?' Callen suggested dryly.

Kensi smiled. 'I don't know how I'm gonna explain this one to my hairdresser.'

Deeks smiled. 'It could be worse,' he said, rubbing at the smouldering hem of his shirt.

'How?' Kensi asked, tugging ruefully at her hair. A chunk came off in her hand. 'Damn it.'

'Your eyebrows could be gone too.'

...

'How are they?' Hetty asked, taking a seat next to Sam in the waiting room.

'Kensi and Deeks, or the now toasted bad guys who stole Murphy's now extra crispy body?' Callen asked.

'My agents, Mr Callen.'

'Technically, he's not your agent, Hetty,' Callen replied.

She raised an eyebrow.

'Sorry... Kensi's hair is falling out in chunks, Deeks' somehow got away without a single lock burned-'

'Mr Callen.'

'Sorry. Deeks got a couple of pretty bad burns to the leg, Doctor said something about 2nd or 3rd degree burns, and apparently he twisted his ankle when Kensi pulled him out of the car. A bit of road rash from diving to the ground, but otherwise, he'll live. Kensi's got a 3rd degree burn on her arm from where she tried to protect herself from the fire, more road rash and as aforementioned, she needs a haircut.'

'So they're basically okay?' Hetty asked.

'Yeah,' Callen answered.

'Thank God. Where are they?'

'Sam took them to see a doc,' Callen sighed.

'And then Kensi kicked me out when the Doc insisted on checking her out.' Sam took a disgruntled seat next to Callen.

'Why?' Callen asked.

'Her clothes were half burned off to start with, but then the Doc insisted that she get into a gown,' Sam explained. 'For some reason, she turned all shy and kicked all the men out of the room.'

'Underneath all the toughness there is a woman, gentlemen,' Hetty reminded.

'What about Deeks? I bet he's making snide remarks through the door,' Callen smirked.

'Nope. He's in the room.'

'But you just said that she kicked them all the men out,' Hetty said.

'Does he count as a man?' Callen asked dryly.

'No, he's stuck on a bed behind a curtain with two nurses applying what sounds like very painful ointment to his leg, and Kensi's threatened to kick him either in the nuts or in the burn, whichever will hurt more, if he looks,' Sam replied with a smile.

'So he definitely won't,' Callen replied.

'Not if he values his life,' Hetty said.

A high pitched cry of pain filtered through the hospital halls.

'And as it turns out, he doesn't,' Sam said.

'I don't think that that was Deeks, guys,' Callen said, making his way down the hall. 'This one?' Muffled curses were coming from behind the door, and they were of the male cop variety.

'Deeks has been passing on a few things,' Sam said, frowning.

'Yes,' was all Hetty said.

She tapped lightly on the door, and the curses stopped.

'Miss Blye?' Hetty called through the door.

'Yeah?' Kensi replied.

'Can we come in?' Hetty asked.

They imagined Kensi shrugging. 'Sure.'

Sam opened the door and one by one they filed in.

'Holy...' Callen caught sight of Kensi.

'Don't say it,' Kensi warned him, watching the doctor carefully wrap her left arm in a sterile white bandage. 'Shit... Can't I have morphine or something while you're doing this?' she snapped at the hapless doctor.

'Sorry,' he apologised.

'What about Jello?' Deeks' voice floated in from behind the curtain. 'She likes Jello. Maybe if you give her some, it'll distract her.'

Kensi rolled her eyes. 'Funny boy.'

A high pitched shriek came from the curtained-off area beside them, and was followed by a loud thud.

'What the hell?' The doctor pulled back the curtain.

Deeks sat in his boxers and nothing much else on the bed, and he appeared to be just fine, except for the puss oozing out of one of the burns on his leg. However, the young female nurse that had been attending to him was unconscious on the floor.

Deeks held up his hands in a signal of surrender. 'I didn't do it, I swear.'

The doctor groaned. 'We've had this problem with this nurse for a month now.'

'What, she faints at the sight of blood?' Sam asked.

'Not blood,' Deeks said. 'Puss.' He observed his oozing leg with a look of disconnected interest.

'Ew,' Kensi said.

'I agree,' Deeks said.

'No, I was speaking about the fact that you need to put a shirt on.'

'What, before you can't help yourself?' Deeks asked with a familiar smirk.

'Something like that...' Kensi said, but something more violent was clearly more on her mind.

Deeks grunted while the doctor propped the nurse into the recovery position as she came to.

'Can you guys help get her out of here?' the doctor asked, eyeing Sam's obvious ability to carry at least three men, let alone one woman.

'Sure,' Sam said easily, picking the woman up and cradling her in his arms. 'Where to?'

'Take her to the nurse's station. Two doors down.'

'Okay.' Sam walked out looking as if he were carrying nothing more cumbersome than a box. Except that he was walking a hell of a lot more gently than that.'

Kensi grunted and got up off of the bed. 'So, can we get out of here now? We've still got a murderer to catch.'

Deeks grunted and got up off of the bed, grabbing hold of one of the crutches that the doctor held out to him. 'You really did a number on my ankle, Kens.'

'Deeks...'

'Okay, okay. You're the one that runs the show when it comes to us, anyway.'

**So, I'm as partial to the mental image of a shirtless Deeks as the next girl... *sigh*... sorry, I'll clean up the drool later.**

**Review, review, review... And thank you to those that do review.**

**And Maxie Kay? My purple plot hippos are **_**way**_** bigger than your bunnies? Are you sure you wanna risk that?**

**XD PurpleHipposRock**


	8. Chapter 8

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 8**

**I found out that the plot hippos don't grant wishes.**

'_He senses something, call it desperation,_

_Another dollar, another day...'_

Deeks grunted as he pulled himself out of the front seat of Callen's car and hoisted himself up on his crutches.

'What the hell happened to you?' Nate's voice floated from the entrance of the Mission.

'Kensi happened, that's what,' Deeks grunted, following Nate's voice into the building.

'What?' Nate asked.

'She parked in the middle of a highway in a way that meant that the van carrying Murphy's body ploughed right into it,' Deeks said, sweat breaking out on his brow from the effort.

'_What_? Were you guys in the car?'

'She's nuts. She's not _that_ nuts.'

Nate sent him a look.

'She busted my ankle pulling me out of the car. Didn't even tell me what she was planning. We were about two yards away when the van banged into our car.'

'Thus the burns and grazes,' Nate said, motioning to Deeks' bandaged arms and legs. 'Couldn't they get you anything more suitable to dress in?'

Deeks was dressed in his holey, ruined jeans and torn up, slightly singed shirt.

'Nope. My go-bag was in Kensi's car.'

'Oh.'

'Yeah, Hetty promised him something from the wardrobe,' Callen said.

'Don't worry, I'll make it something nice,' Hetty assured Deeks. 'This way.'

With a look of foreboding, Deeks followed the petite woman.

'Where are Kensi and Sam?' Nate asked.

'Kensi needed a haircut.'

Nate sent him a confused look.

'Long story,' Callen said, sitting down at his desk.

'We got time.'

'Kensi managed to pull Deeks out of the car only moments before the crash. They were really close to it. It's a miracle that they weren't more badly hurt. In fact, you could say that the worst damage Kensi sustained was the fact that her hair caught fire.'

Nate couldn't help but smile. 'Caught fire?'

Callen shrugged. 'She's got flammable hair.'

The sound of a horn permeated the OSP Centre. 'Hey guys! You made the six o'clock news!'

With a grunt, Callen got up from his chair and began to make his way to the staircase, and Nate followed. Deeks met them there.

'Nice look,' Nate remarked, looking Deeks up and down.

'Shut up,' Deeks mumbled, tugging on the blue dress shirt Hetty had insisted he wear beneath the pinstriped dark blue jacket which matched the pants that she had supplied him with. One foot was encased in a black leather dress shoe while the other was bare in its white bandage, and Hetty had insisted on completing the ensemble with a light and dark blue striped tie, not to mention combing his hair and trimming his beard.

'Look at that,' Callen said. 'You actually might pass for a detective now.'

Deeks just grumbled and limped up the staircase.

Eric's eyes widened as he looked at Deeks. 'What happened to you?'

'Kensi,' Deeks muttered.

'Oh. I was thinking that it might've been Hetty, because even Kensi would never dress you like that.'

Deeks rolled his eyes. 'Funny, Eric.'

'I think it suits you, Deeks,' Nell said with a smile.

Deeks gave her a reluctant smile. 'Thanks.'

Suddenly, Callen let out a loud wolf-whistle.

Deeks sighed. 'Okay, really?' He turned around. 'Isn't that taking it a bit...?' But the words died in his throat.

They'd cut her hair in a way that meant that it was still, surprisingly, as long as it had been pre-fire. They'd layered it so that all the burnt bits could be cut off and then cut a side fringe. The helpful hairdresser refused to let her leave before she had washed the tortured and slightly smoky smelling mop and then had straightened it. Hetty had then supplied her with tight black jeans and a very figure-hugging dark crimson top that didn't look like anything Kensi herself would actually wear. In fact, the only thing normal about her was the fact that her sturdy black leather boots were on her feet. In fact, judging by the look on Hetty's face when she looked at Kensi's feet, Hetty had definitely wanted to dress her in something different.

'Does anyone else feel a bit underdressed?' Eric asked.

'Hey, bud, you're the one in board shorts and flip flops,' Callen said.

Eric shrugged. 'True.'

'I feel a bit overdressed, actually,' Deeks said. 'This is what all the other detectives must feel like... I don't like it.'

'Well, than, thank God you aren't a normal detective,' Kensi said, taking her place next to him. 'What were we watching?'

'You guys made it onto the six o'clock news,' Nell said, pulling up the footage.

The image was taken from a helicopter hovering above the scene. They watched as Kensi parked the car and then got out, clearly yelling something.

'Hey, look, there's you yelling at me to get out,' Deeks said brightly.

Kensi shook her head. 'And there's me with my hair intact.'

'Hey, this look is good on you,' Deeks said.

She frowned at him.

'In fact, every look is good on you, so the statement is kinda redundant, but still... you look very nice,' Deeks bumbled, inadvertently shifting his weight from his non-injured ankle to his injured one and crying out in pain.

'Can we get a chair over here?' Kensi asked Eric.

'No time, Miss Blye,' Hetty said, hanging up her cell phone. 'That was the LAPD. The men in the van were hired to steal the body, and they just traced the credit card used to pay them.'

'Whose is it?' Callen asked.

'A drug dealer by the name of Antonio Cortez. They traced his credit card and it is in use right at this moment. He's having dinner at the Swan tonight.'

'Ooh, the Swan,' Deeks said enviously. 'Always wanted to go there, but on a cop's salary, it's a bit out of my price range.'

'Oh, well, Deeks, it still is tonight,' Sam said, clapping him on the back.

Deeks shrugged. 'C'mon, Cinderella.' He offered his arm to her, but she just elbowed him in the ribs.

'Call me that again, and you'll be limping for a week.'

Callen sat back and watched the scenery of the LA nightlife pass him by. Sam had insisted on driving, as Callen had been the one to drive in the chase that day.

Suddenly, Callen's phone rang. 'Eric, what's up?' he asked after checking the caller ID.

'Change of plans, guys,' Eric said, slightly breathlessly. 'Cortez is moving.'

'Where?'

'I think that he's in a car. He's moving north at quite a quick pace,' Nell jumped in.

'Do we know where he's going?' Deeks' voice butted in.

'Hang on just two minutes, guys,' Eric said, tapping some keys. 'He's stopped outside a nightclub.'

'There are a hell of a lot of nightclubs in this place, Eric. Which one?' Callen asked.

'Uh...' There was the sound of more tapping keys. 'King of Hearts, Hollywood Boulevard.'

'Oh, joy,' Deeks said dryly.

'What?' Kensi asked.

'I can't go in, guys.'

'Why not?' Callen asked.

'Cause I'll be killed.'

'Why?' Kensi asked.

'About six months before I met you guys, I went under as a security guard there. I was trying to get evidence of a meth ring, and a week into it, I had the evidence. But...'

'But?'

'The day before I was supposed to be pulled out, my cover got blown. Pretty spectacularly.'

'What happened?' Eric asked.

'Three broken ribs, a punctured lung, three fractured fingers and a concussion.'

'Ouch,' Nell said.

'No kidding,' Deeks said. 'I was there.'

'Why can't you go in, but?' Kensi asked.

'I put away the owner's son, 25 to life for 1st degree murder. The owner, and I quote, threatened that, if he ever saw me again he would kill me, bring me back to life, kill me again and then kill himself so that he could torture me for eternity in Hell.'

'You're making that up,' Kensi said with a laugh.

'If you want me to prove it, I'll come into the club with you, but I warn you, you will be to blame for any injuries I sustain, and if I'm killed, I'm coming back to haunt you lot,' Deeks said flatly.

'That won't be necessary, Mr Deeks,' Hetty said, breaking into the conversation. 'I think that we can arrange something so that you don't have to risk your life in the club.'

'Thank you,' Deeks said.

'Alright then, however much I would like to see Deeks try to hide from a guy threatening to kill him _twice_, Densi will stay out front-'

'Hey!'

'Hey!'

Callen ignored them. 'And make sure that he doesn't try to make a run for it. Deeks, are there any back entrances?'

'Yeah, but the alley that it leads into just comes back out to the entrance at the front,' Deeks said.

'Then you two will cover the front while Sam and I go in. Okay?'

Silence, as Deeks and Kensi were still sore over the 'Densi' thing.

'Great.'

**I'm really looking forward to your comments on my next chapter, which should be up soon... I think you'll like it, especially all those Densi shippers!**

**Same deal. Review!**

**XD PurpleHipposRock**


	9. Chapter 9

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 9**

**Dear Santa... I've been a very good girl this year. I'd like NCIS LA and Panic At The Disco, because I don't own them.**

'_And if she had the proper words to say, she would tell him,_

_That she had nothing left to sell him..._

_Whoo!'_

**(The inspiration for this chapter was taken mostly from the 'Whoo!' bit, btw...)**

'You guys stay here,' Callen said to the younger pair.

'Yup,' Deeks said glumly, leaning against the bonnet of the car. They watched as Callen and Sam flashed their badges and gained entry to the club.

'Hey, you okay?' Kensi asked him, gently punching him in the shoulder.

Deeks winced and nodded, but didn't put much effort into the lie.

'Deeks.'

'I'm fine,' he mumbled.

Kensi gave a wry smile. 'That lie doesn't sound anymore believable than when _I_ say it.'

He lifted his head and gave her a sheepish grin. 'Just... I'm sorry.'

'About what?'

'If I hadn't screwed that thing up, we'd be in there too, busting the bad guy. Instead, we're stuck out here.'

Kensi paused and then looked at him with a sparkle in her eyes. 'You wanna know something?'

Deeks sighed. 'You're probably gonna tell me anyway, so...'

'No, that's _you_ that would do that, but, um, I'm actually glad we're not in there.'

Deeks frowned. 'Why?'

'Because I'm always sent in as the flirty, girly bait. Do you know how much I get groped?'

'I don't wanna know.'

'I didn't think so.'

'No, I don't wanna know because if I did, I'd probably punch every guy that touched you for the next three missions.'

'Just three?' Kensi pretended to be hurt.

'Well, four, because it's you, Fern.'

Kensi rolled her eyes. 'Thanks, Deeks.'

'No problem. Hey, Callen's calling me. I wonder why.' Deeks picked up the phone.

'Deeks, you need to move now.' Callen wasted no time with the greeting.

'What, why?' Deeks asked.

'What is it?' Kensi asked.

'The owner of the club's moving.'

'Shit. Okay, how long do we have?'

'Two minutes, tops.'

'Okay, have you Cortez yet?'

'We haven't got eyes on him yet.'

'Crap. Okay, Kensi and I'll move to a less exposed location and... We'll figure something while we wait for you guys to come out.'

'Okay.'

'Why are we moving to a less exposed area?' Kensi asked, following Deeks into the alley.

'The owner of the club's coming out. You see why I'm panicking just a little?'

'Just a little,' Kensi agreed. 'Let's get out of sight, then. I've gotten used to you, and I don't want to have to rescue you from getting killed twice.'

'Not to mention, I'm sick of being in hospital. For some reason, my Jello keeps disappearing.' He glanced at her with a look of mock-suspicion.

She smiled and leaned against the wall of the club. 'You should learn to eat it before you go to sleep.'

Deeks shrugged. 'I'm not a huge fan of Jello, anyway.' He joined her against the rough wall.

She sighed. 'You know what I could do with right now?'

'What?' Deeks shifted his weight onto his non-injured leg, which reduced the pain significantly.

'A beer. A nice cold beer.'

Deeks shrugged. 'I wouldn't say no to something a bit stronger, actually.'

'In the state that I'm in, _anything_ somewhat potent would be nice.'

'Mmm-hmmm,' Deeks agreed.

His phone rang again.

'Where are you guys?' Sam asked.

'In the alley,' Kensi said.

'Ooh, bad move,' Callen could be heard to say.

'Why?' Deeks asked.

'Because the owner's going out the _back_ entrance.'

'Shit! How long do we have to move?' Kensi asked.

'Not long enough, with Deeks on crutches. You guys are gonna have to figure something out.'

'What? Have you found Cortez yet?' Deeks asked frantically.

'We've got eyes on him, but we thought you guys might like to whether you're about to be killed or not,' Sam said.

'Gee, thanks guys,' Deeks said flatly.

Kensi rolled her eyes. 'Okay, just get him and get out of there, guys. If what I've got in mind doesn't work, we're gonna need backup _soon_.'

'Yup.' Sam hung up.

'What have you got in mind?' Deeks asked.

She paused for a moment. 'If you ever bring this up again, _I'll_ be the one doing some torturing.'

'Huh?' Deeks asked before finding himself pushed roughly against the cool bricks. 'Kensi, what are you doing?'

Kensi set her jaw. 'Call it the kiss of life.'

'Huh?'

But soft, strawberry-glossed lips were pressed against his before he could make further protest.

As his brain short-circuited and ceased to function, his hands gained a life of their own, gently placing themselves on her waist and pulling her closer. To his surprise, she moaned and deepened the kiss from the innocent thing that had begun to a passionate, _real_ kiss, tongues and teeth clashing, fighting for control. He was sure that his legs were giving out, but it wasn't apparent because he was already relying on a pair of crutches to stay upright. Her arms snaked around his neck and he was drowned in her scent of shampoo and musky perfume and strawberry lip-gloss, something he was sure he'd taste for a week now.

He wasn't aware when a man surrounded by a group of attractive women and surreptitiously followed by a group of muscular men dressed in black passed by, chuckling when he spotted them.

She wasn't aware that her phone was ringing as his arms pulled her closer, only driven by the need to kiss him, forgetting why she was kissing him or where.

A low laugh finally managed to work its way into their ears which could only previously hear the blood pulsing through their veins, hastened by their racing hearts. They broke apart and turned to face a laughing Sam, Callen with his phone in a rather suspicious position and a red faced Cortez with his arms cuffed behind his back.

Deeks was sure that if his face hadn't been red before, he was definitely blushing now.

'Well, you definitely did work something out, because he's not dead,' Callen said dryly.

'What- did you...?' Kensi stared horrified at Callen's phone in his hand.

'You know, we started to get a little worried when you didn't pick up your phone,' Callen said, nodding to the phone which now lay abandoned on the ground next to Deeks' foot. 'But I guess now we shouldn't have. It's a good thing he didn't try to run.'

Kensi hurriedly bent down and picked up the phone, checking the screen before slipping it into her pocket.

Sam chuckled, taking in the dazed look on Deeks' face. 'C'mon. Let's get out of here. Kensi, let me take Deeks, there's more room in my car for the crutches.'

Kensi nodded, glad to be able to escape at least _that_ awkward moment. 'Sure.'

'C'mon, bud,' Callen grunted, pulling Cortez in the direction of his Mercedes. 'You got to explain why you were trying to steal the body of a dead NCIS agent.'

Sam helped Deeks into the passenger seat, and then started the car.

'Are you sure I'm not dead?' Deeks finally asked after a few blocks of driving.

Sam laughed. 'Very, man. Why?'

Deeks shook his head. 'That must be what being kissed by an angel feels like.'

**Well? Comments? Anything? Did you think I'd taken too long for them to kiss? Because for your information, the murder victim hasn't been dead for 24 hours yet! Whatever you think, I'd love to know.**

**Also, forgive me when it comes to the romance stuff. Never been kissed. That's why I don't generally do romance. So be warned. This story, at least, won't have Densi getting incredibly intimate.**

**After this very character driven chapter, the next chapter's gonna be very case oriented - I've been neglecting the case slightly. **

**XD PurpleHipposRock**

**P.S. Sorry, I know I'm talking a lot and all you want to do is hit the pretty blue button below, but the amount of updates are probably going to slow down in the next few weeks for several reasons.**

**A. I live in NSW, Australia, which means that I've got really important exams coming up and I'll be studying for those (wish me luck) and**

**B. The government is taking my laptop away (well, they **_**did**_** give it to me for free) so that they can do updates and everything (read: make it slower).**

**And so, this means that updates will be sparse. Sorry, but please keep reading.**

**XD PurpleHipposRock**


	10. Chapter 10

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 10**

**Please, Mr Brennan? **

'_Say what you mean,_

_Tell me I'm right,_

_And let the sun rain down on me...'_

Callen placed a photo on the table and jabbed a finger at it. 'Special Agent Sara Murphy. Did you have her killed?'

Cortez's eyes flicked from him to the photo and then back up to him. 'No.' He smiled.

Callen turned to Sam. 'Well, Sam. Do you believe him?'

Sam snorted. 'No.'

Cortez's cold, steely eyes eyed the two men who seemed completely in their element. 'I didn't kill the woman, your Agent Murphy.'

Sam paused and considered this. 'No, it still doesn't seem truthful to me, G.'

'Me either, Sam. He's not really giving us evidence that proves his innocence.'

'You want evidence?' Cortez asked.

'It'd be nice,' Callen said, sitting down.

'Very nice,' Sam said, repeating his action.

Callen frowned and turned to Sam. 'Aren't you supposed to be that bad cop?'

'Me? I thought that it was you that was supposed to be the bad cop.'

'No, I thought that I was supposed to be a good cop. You like being the bad cop.'

'Granted, I do do it better than you.'

'Definitely,' Callen agreed.

Sam shrugged and looked at Cortez. 'Looks like you're in luck, bud. You got two good cops. If I were you, I'd take advantage of it.'

Cortez grunted. 'When was she killed?'

Callen turned to Sam. 'Now he's getting convincing. I'll jog your memory. Around three thirty this morning.'

Cortez looked at him incredulously. 'Man, I was _fast_ asleep.'

'Anyone who can verify that, Mr Cortez?' Sam asked politely.

'Yeah. The cops who was staking out my house.'

Sam turned to Callen, and the surprise was evident on his face. 'What cops?'

'We weren't told anything about any cops, and we didn't see any when we picked you up, Cortez,' Callen said.

'Of course you didn't, the cops you had keepin' watch were too busy sucking face.'

Sam snorted. 'That's true.'

'To be fair, they were trying to save his life.'

Sam shook his head. 'Like they haven't been wanting to do that for a long time.'

Callen nodded. 'True, very true. Where would those cops be now?'

Cortez shrugged. 'I'll say this for 'em, they're pretty good at tailing. No matter what my driver tried, he couldn't shake 'em.'

Sam sighed. 'What sort of cops?'

Cortez shrugged. 'I assumed LAPD. They've been trying to put my ass in jail for a year now.'

'Yeah, well, your ass is definitely going away, followed by the rest of you,' Callen said.

'Hey, what? What'd I do?' he asked.

'You tried to steal her body, Cortez!'

Cortez relaxed against his seat. 'Oh, yeah, that.'

'Yeah, _that,'_ Callen said. 'Why'd you do it?'

'Well, this morning one of my boys comes around saying that an NCIS agent got killed last night in a house fire. When I ask him why I care about some NCIS agent, he says that it was the one that came around a few days before, asking about dirty drugs and something to do with an Agent... Pfft, can't even think of his name... uh, Pain... no... Rain... Somethin' like that.'

'And what did you tell her?' Sam asked, leaning forwards in his chair.

'Man, I didn't have a thing to do with any of that stuff that happened to those Navy guys. Different people altogether. If you buy your stuff from me, you know that you at least get clean stuff.'

'Because taking _clean_ drugs really makes a difference when it comes to poisoning your body with weed, yeah?' Callen asked dryly.

Cortez just sat in stony silence.

'Why'd you steal her body, then?' Sam asked. 'If you had nothing to do with it.'

'Oh, um... She got some stuff from me.'

Callen's eyes widened. 'No, she wouldn't have.'

'Oh, no, man, not to _use_. She said that if I was so sure that it wasn't my dope killing people, I wouldn't mind if she took a sample of my stuff for the labs to compare.'

'And you gave it to her?' Callen asked.

'Well, yeah. Cos I know it wasn't my stuff.'

'And why did you try to steal her body, then?' Sam asked. 'You're still not making any sense.'

'Someone contacted me anonymously saying that if I knew what was good for me, I'd get rid of her body before the police could autopsy it because before she was killed, someone had shot her up with my stuff so that she would stop struggling. And if _my_ stuff is found in her blood, you guys will come after me assuming that I killed her.'

'We came after you anyway.'

Callen smirked. 'No-one ever said he was smart, Sam.'

'Well, they'd be lying if they did.'

Callen sighed and then got up from his chair. 'I think we should just hand him over, Sam, and they can charge him with grand-theft-auto and interfering with a federal investigation.'

Sam nodded. 'Good idea, G. Have fun in prison, Cortez.'

'But guys, I helped you!'

They closed the door on his protests.

'It wasn't Pain and it wasn't Rain,' Deeks declared the moment the two men stepped into the room.

'How do you know?' Callen asked.

'Because it was Tane. Agent Daniel Tane.'

'I'm gonna ask again, how do you know, Deeks?' Sam asked.

'We ran into Nate at the back-up office,' Kensi said. 'He told us that he and Murphy were friends, and a couple of days ago, they had coffee. She told him that she suspected the Agent Afloat on the _Lincoln_, Agent Daniel Tane.'

'Suspected him of what?' Callen asked.

'She suspected him of having something to do with getting drugs onto the ship,' Deeks said, sipping from a cup of coffee.

'What sort of something?' Callen asked.

Kensi shrugged. 'Nate didn't know.'

'What, he didn't prod?' Sam asked curiously.

Deeks shook his head. 'Apparently not.'

'Anyone here know Tane?' Sam asked.

The others shook their heads.

'I got Eric to pull his file, but I haven't had a chance to look at it due to other circumstances,' Deeks said, leaning against the table with a grunt of discomfort.

'You okay?' Sam asked.

Deeks nodded. 'Just twinges a little.'

Sam smiled. 'We've all been there, man. Didn't the hospital give you painkillers?'

Deeks pulled the pack of tablets out of his pocket. 'OxyContin. Not a wise idea for me to take these while at work.'

'Why?' Kensi asked, plucking them from his hand.

'Oxycodone tends to make me a bit loopy,' Deeks said, taking them back.

'Loopier than normal?' Callen asked.

'Funny,' Deeks replied, replacing them in his pocket and instead taking the packet of Advil from Kensi's hand and knocking two back dry.

'Hey!' Kensi exclaimed, snatching them back. 'Don't you want something to drink with that?'

Deeks shook his head, swallowing hard. 'Doesn't help. I hate taking pills, try to avoid it.'

'Water generally does help with that.'

'Not in my case.' He coughed, trying to get rid of the sensation. 'I'm not good with swallowing without chewing.'

'That explains why you take so long to eat,' Kensi said.

'Just because I'm not like you. You basically _inhale_ doughnuts.'

'Not _inhale_ them,' Kensi replied. 'I just eat quickly.'

'One day I'm gonna have to perform the Heimlich manoeuvre on you,' Deeks warned.

'As long as it's not mouth to mouth, I don't care,' Kensi replied.

'You didn't seem to mind it so much before,' Callen said, jumping in and saying it just as Deeks opened his mouth to say the same thing.

'Thanks, Callen, steal my thunder there?' Deeks said acting offended.

'It had to be said, no matter who said it,' Callen replied.

Deeks tilted his head. 'True.'

'Boys!' Kensi exclaimed, red-faced. 'It's half-past eleven. I'm going home.'

Sam chuckled. 'Night, Kens.'

'Good night, Sam.' Kensi bestowed up on him a grateful glance which significantly cooled when it moved upon the other two before leaving the boathouse.

'So, first thing tomorrow we find Tane, right?' Deeks asked, picking up the blue pinstriped jacket that Hetty had lent him.

'Yup,' said Sam.

Callen smirked. 'Night guys.'

'Night, G,' Sam said as Callen walked out the door.

Deeks sighed and limped out the door, while Sam locked it behind him.

'You okay, Deeks?'

'I know it didn't mean anything, but I'm gonna have a hell of a time getting that kiss out of my head.'

Sam clapped him on the shoulder. 'To tell you the truth, Deeks, I've never seen her kiss _anyone_ like that before.'

Deeks shrugged. 'She was just trying to stop me from being killed.'

Sam smiled sympathetically as he got into the car. 'I can't help it if that's what you believe.'

**Insults? Compliments? Just feel like raving on about how brilliant Densi is? Please express your thoughts through the use of a review.**

**XD PurpleHipposRock**


	11. Chapter 11

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 11**

**So, I'm never going to own it. I'll just play with the toys and put them back mostly un-maimed.**

'_Give me a sign,_

_I want to believe...'_

'Morning, Deeks, Sam,' Callen said, walking into the bullpen, holding a Styrofoam cup of steaming coffee.

'Morning Callen.'

'Morning G.'

'Where's Kensi?' Callen asked.

Both men shrugged, one behind paperwork, the other behind a comic book, his injured ankle propped up on the desk.

'Don't think she's here yet,' Deeks said, turning a page.

'Should you be reading that?' Callen asked.

Deeks nodded. 'Sure. Work starts at nine thirty, and it is nine fifteen. Therefore, I have a right to do whatever I like.' He sipped from his mega-size coffee mug.

'Tane's reporting to the boatshed at ten,' Sam informed Callen. 'I think Densi should interview him.'

'And what will you two do?' Deeks asked.

'Well, I think Rose would be finished with the body by now.'

'We've loaded her up, haven't we?' Deeks asked.

'Well, we did give her two extra bodies yesterday.'

'It was the men's fault for stealing it in the first place.' Kensi stalked into the room, her high heels clicking on the ground.

'Morning, Kensi,' Callen said.

Deeks looked up from his comic and almost choked on a mouthful of his coffee.

'Good morning, guys,' Kensi said, putting her handbag down at her desk and slipping her phone into the pocket of a pair of jeans that definitely weren't a size two but much, much smaller. Her newly cut hair was curled into loose ringlets and she wore a loose, creamy coloured off-the-shoulder top over a bright red camisole. She looked so beautiful that you didn't really notice the bandage on her arm.

'You feeling good today, Kens?' Callen asked, taking a mouthful of coffee.

'Actually, I am. Why do you ask?' Kensi asked brightly, blinking her long lashes.

'You look hot,' Sam said candidly.

'Why, thank you, Sam,' Kensi replied.

'Does the new haircut have something to do with this?' Callen asked.

'It might,' Kensi smiled, blinking long dark lashes that brushed her pinker-than-usual cheeks. 'Are you alright, Deeks?'

'Just coughing up a lung, don't mind me,' Deeks wheezed.

'How about the ankle?'

'Still limping.' He nodded to the crutches resting against the desk.

'Mr Deeks, please take your foot off of the desk,' Hetty said.

'Doctor said that I should keep it elevated to avoid swelling,' Deeks replied.

'I have the feeling that it's a little past that,' Kensi said, nudging it.

'Ow,' Deeks said pointedly.

'Whiner.'

'You're the one that pulled me out of the car,' Deeks replied.

Kensi shook her head. 'You didn't get out of the car when I told you to.'

'You're the one that parked on a freeway!'

'Densi!'

Kensi and Deeks froze and turned to Hetty, who stood with her arms folded and a stern look in her eyes.

'Yes?' they tentatively asked in unison.

'Go talk to Agent Tane. Here's his file, you can review it on the drive to the boatshed,' Hetty said, handing it to Kensi.

'Okay,' Kensi said, flipping it open. 'Come on, Deeks.'

'I wanna drive,' said Deeks.

'Not likely,' Kensi said, jingling the keys in her palm.

'But you always get to drive,' Deeks was heard to protest as they made their way down the hall and out the door.

'And I'm not gonna trust you behind the wheel when you've got a busted ankle and 2nd degree burns all up your legs.'

'You've got burns up your arm.'

'Not half as bad as you. You are not driving, Deeks. I value my life too much for that.'

'Gee, thanks. Tell me...'

Their bickering faded as they got further and further away.

'What are you going to about them?' Callen asked, turning to Hetty and watching as she smiled, listening to them as they bickered on their way out of OSP.

'Sounds to me as if they are perfectly fine.'

'Fine? That don't sound fine, Hetty, if you don't mind me saying,' Sam said.

'They sound exactly as you and Mr Callen did at that stage in your relationship.'

'Relationship? I think you mean partnership, Hetty,' Callen said.

'No, Mr Callen, it is definitely better called a relationship.'

'Do you know something that we don't?' Sam asked suspiciously.

'Don't I always?' Hetty asked archly.

'No, what Sam means it that-'

'I'm very aware about what Mr Hanna means, Mr Callen. And no, they haven't.'

'I don't even know how you know _that_,' Callen replied.

Hetty smiled again. 'It would be simple. There would just be something simply different about them.'

Sam snorted. 'The moment they stop bickering is the moment that hell freezes over.'

Hetty smiled. 'I think that the ME is waiting for you, boys.'

Sam smiled and collected his jacket from his desk. 'See you, Hetty.'

'Bye, Hetty,' Callen repeated. 'We'll call as soon as we have something.'

'Agent Tane?' Kensi threw the file of the investigation onto the table and motioned that he sit.

He nodded. 'Wow. This place exists.'

'You work for NCIS and you didn't know that this place exists?' Deeks asked.

He nodded again. 'Apparently. Most people think that this place is a myth.'

'Special Agent Blye, Detective Deeks.'

'I've heard about you two.'

The pair sat down opposite him.

'What?' Deeks asked.

'The whole thing with the Russians and the little black book is kind of urban legend now.'

'Not a legend, it happened,' Deeks muttered.

Tane turned to Kensi. 'Is it true that you made it through a maze of lasers and then survived the building blowing up?'

Kensi winced and Deeks winced in sympathy.

'Bad memory, man, we don't talk about it. My back still hasn't recovered.'

'Oh... sorry. So, uh, why am I here?' Tane was young and eager, and he obviously worshiped the more experienced partners.

'You recently got off of the _Lincoln_ on assignment, right?' Kensi asked, flipping open the file.

'That's correct, yes,' Tane said. 'There was a pretty bad drug problem and I couldn't make head nor toe of it.'

'Why didn't you ask for help?' Kensi asked.

'I did. That's why Agent Murphy flew out.'

'You heard about what happened to Murphy, yeah?' Deeks asked.

'Yeah. She was so nice.'

'We know,' Kensi said.

'We think that her death had something to do with the case she was working,' Deeks said.

'Wh-what, the drugs?' Tane stuttered. 'Why would the drugs have anything to do with this?'

'Because drugs often do,' Deeks said grimly. 'What can you tell us about it?'

'A week out from LA, a petty officer was found dead in his bunk. I sent the body back to the ME in Washington, a Dr Mallard, who found high concentrations of not only methamphetamines and cocaine, but also, strangely enough, potassium cyanide. Only a week later, another sailor collapses unconscious on the flight deck. He gets rushed to the bay and is barely saved, same stuff.'

'That would be Petty Officer Maine, yeah?' Kensi asked, casting an eye over the file.

'Yeah. And Petty Officer Paul Lite checked into the bay only a few hours afterwards. He'd only just found out about the bad stuff and wanted to make sure that he'd be okay. Turns out that he _had_ gotten a bad batch.'

'We know; some other agents talked to him. Have any other cases turned up?'

'Not since we disembarked from the _Lincoln_, I've been making sure.'

'And I haven't found any cases of civilians coming foul of this stuff,' Deeks said, flicking to the back of the file. 'I checked with LAPD, nothing. Seems like only Navy seamen are getting bad batches.'

'Only Navy seamen on the _Lincoln_, Agent Tane,' Kensi corrected.

'So, you think someone on the ship gave it to 'em?' Tane asked, eyes wide. 'Whoa.'

Deeks paused and then took a seat next to Kensi. 'Just out of curiosity, Tane, was it you?'

Tane's mouth dropped open. 'What? _Me_? Oh, no, man, not me. I'd never do anything like that to anyone.'

'Are you sure?' Kensi asked. 'Because Murphy felt a little suspicious.'

'About me? Are you sure?' Tane asked.

'Well, you were the Agent Afloat on the _Lincoln_, right?' Deeks asked.

'But... but I would never do anything like that,' Tane stuttered.

Kensi pulled out another file and placed it on the table. 'You see, Tane, we did a little research. Your great grandfather was part of the British Royal Navy in World War One, yeah? And then your grandfather fought in World War 2. Your dad was part of Vietnam. _You_ were gonna be fourth generation Navy.'

Deeks took over almost seamlessly, matching her intensity exactly. 'Until you all found out that _you_ had a heart murmur. And there went the big dream.'

'So you joined NCIS. Close as you could get, yeah?'

'But when you got stuck on a big ship full of all these healthy, eager Marines, people who managed to be what you had always wanted to be, didn't that just make you a little mad?' Deeks asked, holding two fingers apart by about half an inch.

'No, no!' Tane protested. 'It's an honour to serve the Navy in any way I can.'

'I don't believe you,' Deeks said, blue eyes shining cold.

'You know what I think, Deeks?' Kensi asked, turning to her partner.

'I think you're thinking the same thing that I am, but you can tell me all the same,' Deeks replied.

'I think he snapped. These men have the opportunity to serve in the Navy, and they throw it all away by using. So one day, you contact their supplier, anonymously of course.'

'Of course,' Deeks agreed. 'And you pay him the $5000 that you withdrew from your account a month ago to slip a little more into the mix than those men paid for.'

'Yeah, that's exactly what I was thinking. Funny that.'

'What do you think, Agent Tane?' Deeks asked.

Tane bit his lip. 'I think I need a lawyer.'

'Now that's a brilliant idea.'

**Well? Was I a bit too hard on Tane? Do you think that he did it? Or is he innocent? Let me know...**

**Also, thanks to everyone who wished me luck on my exams. I've finished the trials… now for the real thing… *gulp*…**

**Now, people, listen up! Time for some tough love. I refuse to post the next chapter until I get at least five reviews… is that too much to ask?**

**XD PurpleHipposRock**


	12. Chapter 12

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 12**

**Santa didn't leave the copyright in my stocking. (No wonder he didn't. We don't have a chimney!)**

'_Whoa... Mona Lisa, you're guaranteed to run this town,_

_Whoa... Mona Lisa, I'd pay to see you frown!'_

'Rose?' Callen called into the apparently empty autopsy room.

She appeared from behind a table. 'Hi guys.'

'Hey,' Sam said. 'What have you got for us?'

Rose nodded to the autopsy table. 'She's a little crispier than the last time I saw her.'

'What can you tell us?'

'Well, I found enough unburnt flesh for a tox screen and a DNA comparison. I'm still waiting on the DNA comparison, but as you guys predicted, there was tetrahydrocannabinol in her system.'

Callen paused. 'Translation?'

'THC, G,' Sam said. 'Coke.'

'Oh, weed.'

'Whatever you wanna call it, our lady's blood was pumped with it,' Rose said.

'Well, we expected that. We think that she was sedated before she was shot.'

'Which was exactly the case,' she said, motioning to the body.

'So our drug dealer friend Cortez was telling the truth,' Sam said.

'Apparently so,' Callen agreed. 'We'll just have to charge him with stealing the body.'

'And interfering with a federal investigation.'

'Is that what you call it?' Rose asked, nodding to the extra-crispy body on the table.

'Well, I'd also call it well done,' Callen reflected.

Sam chuckled.

'Have you a positive identification on the body, though?' Callen asked. 'I know we're waiting for the DNA, but...'

'Dentals matched. Blood type matched. I am fairly sure, yes, that this is Murphy.'

'Damn,' Sam muttered under his breath.

The other two nodded in concurrence.

'And the other two?' Callen asked, nodding to the other two bodies.

'Both were dead before they burned, from the crash. Neither were wearing their seatbelts,' Rose said with a disapproving look to the bodies.

'If they weren't dead right now, I'd say that they'd got the message,' Sam said.

'Positive ID on our men, then? Cortez's guys?' Callen asked.

Rose nodded. 'Yes. Dental matches on both, plus I matched x-rays.'

'Okay. Thanks Rose. We've gotta go catch a bad guy.'

Rose smiled and nodded. 'Good luck.'

The scenery outside the car was spectacular - rolling waves crashing onto a golden sandy beach beneath a dazzling blue sky. But neither of the partners in the car were witness to its beauty - the thick, awkward silence inside the car was enough to drain anyone's attention span. It had been the first time they'd been alone since the kiss.

Finally, though, Deeks _had_ to break the silence. 'Kensi, about last night-'

'Deeks, I did it to save your freaking life. Nothing else. End of story, let's stop talking about it.' She gripped the steering wheel hard, turning the skin over her knuckles white and keeping her eyes trained on the road.

'Kensi that was _not_ an undercover kiss. Trust me; I'm the master of undercover kisses and that was not one.'

Kensi groaned and pulled over to the side of the road before facing him. 'I'm starting to wish that I'd just let him kill you.'

Deeks smiled and shook his head. 'You'd never do that. You love me too much, Fern, and _I_ think that that little kiss proved my point.'

'Little?'

Deeks grinned. 'Ah! I see I'm not the only one who had dwelled upon that kiss last night.'

Realising her mistake, Kensi turned and looked out the window instead of at her partner, who she was sure that she would punch if she looked at him any longer. Or kiss him. Because that kiss really had been heavenly.

Deeks shook his head with a smile and leaned back against the car seat, waiting for her to make the next move.

Finally, she did. 'Deeks, I don't know why you can't just leave things alone.'

'Because you know that I just can't.'

And _damn_ the man, but he was right.

'Then what do you want? There's really nothing we _can_ do.'

'We can talk about it.' He was an immoveable force when it came to that.

'Great. Let's talk about it.'

Silence.

'Well?' Kensi prodded. 'You're the one who wanted to talk about it. Talk.'

'Give me a moment here; I'm trying to gather my thoughts.'

'Well, while you're gathering them, I'm gonna start driving again or else we'll have Hetty calling us wondering why it is we've pulled up beside a beach.'

'Well, there are two options there,' Deeks began. 'Either I've convinced you to let me surf or we're having-'

'You don't wanna finish that sentence, Mister,' Kensi said, pulling away from the curb.

'Well, that's one way we could finish this whole awkwardness.'

Kensi glanced sharply at him before turning a corner.

'I mean, we sleep together, that finishes the tension-'

'Do you remember what happened last time you slept with a co-worker, Deeks?'

Deeks winced. 'Unfortunately.'

'Exactly. I'd like to live, if that's okay with you.'

'Well, I'd like you to live.'

'Great, we've agreed. We both want me to live.'

Kensi pulled up outside the OSP and parked.

'This isn't over, Kens.' Deeks unbuckled his seatbelt.

'I know it's not, because there's no way to finish the conversation, which is exactly why I never wanted to start talking about it in the first place.' Kensi got out of the car just as Callen and Sam drove past.

'Well, we could try and finish it using other means.' Deeks smiled lecherously.

Kensi closed her eyes and took a calming breath, trying to remember reasons why killing him would not be a good idea. When she opened them, they met blue.

He smiled, and she realised that he had her pinned against the car.

'No, Deeks,' Kensi said, and knew that she sounded like she was trying to stop a puppy from jumping up on her. And that was, now that she thought about it, a pretty accurate description.

'I wasn't talking about _that_ Kens,' Deeks breathed. 'No, I think I'll wait for _that_ when _you_ feel like it. But I know that you like it when I do this.' And he leaned forwards and pressed his lips against hers.

_It's funny_, Kensi thought, drowning in the scent of salt water and sunscreen and cologne and coffee, all mixed together to make a strange but heady aphrodisiac. _Any other guy, and I'd have probably kicked him in the nuts by now. But there's something about _this_ guy that just kind of... well, the best word for it would probably be that he _paralyses_ me._

Suddenly, there was a piercing whistle.

They broke apart and both saw Callen and Sam staring at them with large grins on their faces. Callen handed Sam three ten dollar notes. 'You win,' he said.

'C'mon Densi, stop making out and come and hear what we found out,' Sam said.

Suddenly, (and furiously) Kensi realised what position she and Deeks had been caught in and now all she wanted (besides another kiss - she knew that _that_ wouldn't be possible as long as Sam and Callen were standing there) was _out_. Furious at her partner for putting her into that situation, she slapped him _hard_ across the face, revelling in his wince, and stalked away.

Deeks rubbed his face and made his way to the other men, where he plucked a note out of Sam's hand.

Both men looked at him with consternation in their eyes.

Suddenly, he grinned. 'Totally worth it.'

**Right, I'll leave Densi alone now. I've had my fun, but I **_**won't**_** put them together, not matter how much you grovel and beg (though I **_**might**_** do it for a whole lot of chocolate - and the rights to NCISLA so that I can stop writing that silly disclaimer!)**

**PS I only got ****three**** reviews when I specifically asked for five… sad face : ( But I'm updating anyway because I had a good day today (second in the maths test, whoo!)**

**Fine, I'll ask for four this time before updating… is that too much to ask?**

**XD PurpleHipposRock**


	13. Chapter 13

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 13**

**Not mine (and I'm still writing this silly disclaimer people, so guess what that means? No Densi love... D: )**

'_Mona Lisa... Wear me out..._

_Pleased to please ya...'_

Kensi walked into the OSP Centre and groaned at the sight of the big screen. 'You guys too?' Eric was handing Nell twenty bucks.

'Nice kiss,' Nell remarked.

'Nell.'

'Sorry, but you guys really do have good chemistry. There's a reason why _your_ names go together so perfectly to create 'Densi'.'

'It's just a coincidence, there's nothing between Deeks and me-'

'Besides kisses that make your legs go weak, you have to admit that,' Deeks' voice floated out from somewhere behind her.

'I'm taking the fifth,' Kensi said dryly.

'Ooh, refusing to testify on the grounds that you might incriminate yourself,' Deeks said, and Kensi knew that he was grinning. 'That makes you sound guilty, you know. I learnt that in law school.'

'Shut up.'

'Yes ma'am.'

'What did you guys learn?' Kensi asked the older partners.

'That it was indeed Murphy, she was dosed with coke before she was shot, most likely to sedate her, and then she was shot in the head.'

'So, everything we already knew,' Deeks said.

Callen thought about it for a moment. 'Yeah.'

'Well, what did you get?' Sam asked defensively.

'Well, Tane started out by telling us what he knew about the investigation,' Kensi began.

'And it turns out that only seamen on the _Lincoln_ got bad coke-' Deeks continued for her.

'So we did a little poking into Tane's past-'

'Turns out he could've been-'

'Fourth generation Navy, except-'

'He had a heart murmur which stopped him from-'

'Joining up. And we started-'

'Wondering whether Tane might've been a little-'

'Jealous of the people who had made it into the Navy-'

'And maybe he was a little madder because people were-'

'Using and throwing away their opportunity-'

'To serve. We had accounting take a look at his-'

'Bank account, and he'd withdrawn-'

'Five grand last month-'

'And we couldn't help feeling that that was a little-'

'Suspicious.' They said the last word together, glaring at one another.

Callen covered his mouth with his hand to hide his smile, while Nell and Eric were suddenly very busy typing something into keyboards, which would have been just fine and quite normal except that Eric was trying to type something into his desk, his keyboard having been stolen by Nell, and Sam just smiled, not bothering to hide it.

'What?' Deeks asked.

'That was just so-'

'Adorable,' Sam finished for his partner.

'What?' Kensi asked.

'You were finishing each other's sentences.'

'It was actually a little confusing.'

'It was the sign of a good partnership,' Hetty said, appearing from nowhere. 'They anticipated what the other was going to say.'

'Anticipate. We're good at-'

'Anticipating,' Deeks finished for her.

'Sure,' Callen said unbelievingly.

'I have an idea.'

'What's that?' Deeks asked his partner.

'Let's ignore them.'

'Ignoring is childish, silly and petty. Works for me.' Deeks smiled at her.

'God, you two were _made_ for each other,' Sam chuckled.

'Eric, Nell, what have _you_ found out?' Kensi asked the two techs.

'We've found out who _has_ been supplying the dirty drugs,' Nell said.

'We subpoenaed Cortez's phone records, and at six-thirty yesterday morning he received a call from one Theodore Ramirez.'

'Ramirez? As in Teddy the Shredder?' Deeks asked.

'As in Theodore 'Teddy the Shredder' Ramirez,' Nell confirmed.

'Oh, God, guys, this guy is not good news.'

'We figured that from the nickname,' Callen said, straight-faced.

'No, I worked undercover as a dealer for him, oh, two years before I met you guys.'

'You get around a lot, don't you?' Sam said, folding his arms.

'I'm the LAPD's best. Of course I do.'

'Very modest. If you're the LAPD's best, it explains a lot about Harvey,' Kensi muttered.

'Thank you, _partner_,' Deeks said, sending her a wry glance.

She sent him a sunny grin in reply. 'You're welcome.'

'Anyway, my cover got blown _bad_ by another dealer who I'd busted three years before. He'd just got out on parole and hated my guts.'

'It's not a hard thing to do,' Kensi mumbled.

'Not really feeling the love, Fern.'

'What love?'

'Ouch, Kensi. Just... ouch. Anyway, this guy? Bad news.'

'How bad?' Callen asked.

'When LAPD got me out, they needed three paramedics and the Jaws of Life.'

'Seems like a theme with you. Was it another boa constrictor?' Kensi asked.

'Actually, there was a situation with one of those crushers that turn written-off cars into crushed-up metal boxes...'

'And the three paramedics?'

Deeks grunted before pulling his shirt up and turning around.

'Jesus!' Kensi cried out, stepping away from him.

'Oh, my God. How did you survive that?' Nell asked, pain and disgust and pity mingled into a single expression on her face.

'Three months of rehabilitation.'

'What did it?' Sam questioned, looking at it with a sort of morbid interest.

'Stiletto. This guy was in the habit of sharpening it when he got bored.'

'That scar's worse than any I've gotten,' Callen said, wincing in sympathy pain.

There was a white slash streaking down one side of his back, disappearing beneath the waistband of his jeans, marring otherwise tanned perfection.

'Thus the nickname 'Teddy the Shredder' and the three paramedics. I lost so much blood that I was clinically dead for three and a half minutes.' Deeks tugged his shirt back down and turned back to face the group.

'Oh, my God,' Kensi breathed, letting her hand rest on his lower arm.

'I'm alive, that's all that counts, right?' Deeks asked, looking around.

'Yeah, I guess.'

'So, this guy is bad, bad news?' Eric asked, pulling up his picture.

'Very bad,' Deeks agreed, shuddering at the sight.

'And he's been dealing in dirty drugs, but only to Marines on the _Lincoln_,' Callen said thoughtfully. 'Has that thing with Tane come to anything?'

'He lawyer-ed up, isn't saying anything, not even bothering to provide an alibi,' Kensi said, folding her arms and leaning against the table next to Deeks.

'Which raises the question: does he even have an alibi?' Deeks said.

'Well, did you ask him?' Callen asked.

'We didn't get that far,' Deeks said.

'We were, what you might call, a little rough on him.'

'Rough?' Sam asked.

'We might have quite... outright... accused him of giving Marines drugs laced with potassium cyanide,' Kensi muttered.

'Real nice, you two. He's supposed to be on our side, you know,' Sam said, scolding.

'Well, we don't know whether he's on our side or not because we don't know whether he'd been lacing coke with potassium cyanide.'

'Okay, Sam, why don't you and I take another run at Tane, maybe be a bit nicer than these two-'

'Good cop, nice cop instead of bad cop, worse cop-'

'She's worse,' Deeks immediately said, pointing to his partner.

Kensi took a breath and turned to him. 'Funny boy, but yes, you are bit too delicate to be known as anything worse than bad.'

'Hey! I'm not delicate!' Deeks protested.

'You whine when you get a paper cut.'

'Those things sting!'

'Whiner.'

'Mocker.'

'Oh, we're not starting this again, are we?'

'I sure hope not,' Callen said, breaking into their quarrel.

They both looked at him.

'Don't you have paperwork to do or something?' Sam asked.

'Probably,' Deeks muttered. 'You people have any respect for the trees? There must be at least three trees' worth in my in box alone.'

'Then maybe you should try and get it all into your out box,' Hetty suggested.

'What about Teddy the Shredder?' Kensi asked.

'We can't take a run at Ramirez until we have hard, cold proof that he's involved in this. It was, after all, an anonymous call,' Callen said. 'Unless you two think that you can do anything about that?'

Nell and Eric both shrugged and turned to their computers.

'And I'm out completely,' Deeks said.

'Not completely,' Hetty said.

'What?' Both Kensi and Deeks lifted their heads and looked at their boss.

'Well, you say you spent some time with Mr Ramirez?'

Deeks nodded. 'Almost twelve months.'

'Then I don't suppose you'll object to digging out your files on him and collating some information on him. We might find a weak spot that allows us to arrest him.'

'This guy's got _good_ lawyers.'

'All we need to do is rattle his cage,' Callen said. 'Go on, Deeks. Kensi, help him.'

'Of course,' Kensi mumbled before following her limping partner out the door.

'And we'll talk to Tane.'

'Good luck, and Mr Callen, Mr Hanna?'

Both men turned and watched as she walked closer.

'Watch yourselves. This case is turning out...'

'Complicated,' Callen finished.

'Yes.'

'Don't worry, Hetty. We'll be safe.'

Hetty watched them as they made their way out of OSP. 'You and I have different definitions of 'safe'.'

**Don't worry, they'll be **_**fine**_**... (*Muhahaha*)**

** Today is a very, very good day. I might even call it a brilliant day (XD). It's Friday (well, it is in Australia, anyway) which is good enough, but not only that but Gaddafi is dead (if you don't know what I mean, a) what hole have you been in? and b) check out Google News) ****and**** I've had my driving license for six entire months without causing a major traffic accident (and before you ask, I haven't had a minor one either!). Plus, when I asked for four reviews, I got five! I'm gonna be ambitious and ask for six this time. I might not get it, and I may even post even if I don't get the whole six: it depends if that day is as good as today…**

** XD PurpleHipposRock**


	14. Chapter 14

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 14**

**The only thing I own is my drug-induced imaginary invisible purple hippo named Barry (PM me if you're confused and want to know more). I do not own the rights to NCIS:LA or 'The Ballad Of Mona Lisa' by Panic! At The Disco (the most awesome song in the world!).**

'_Mona Lisa... wear me out...'_

'Agent Tane, I'm Agent Callen.'

'And I'm Agent Sam Hanna.'

Tane's previously lifeless eyes sparked. 'You mean the Callen that doesn't have a first name?'

'You've heard something about us, then?' Callen asked, nodding.

'Turns out legends aren't necessarily as nice as they can first appear,' Tane mumbled, sinking into his seat.

'Yeah, I'm sorry about my junior agent and her partner,' Callen apologised. 'It's just, we're all on edge. We've lost one of our own... you know? We just want to find out what's happened.'

'Well, I didn't do it,' Tane said.

'And we aren't saying that you did,' Sam said reassuringly. 'It's just, we need to know that you didn't.'

'Well, I didn't hurt Agent Murphy! I swear, I didn't.'

'And I, for one, believe you. How about you, Sam?'

Sam dipped his head in a nod. 'Yeah. Sure.'

'But to convince the others that you're as innocent as we believe you are, we need to know where you were at about half past three to half past six yesterday morning,' Callen said smoothly and reassuringly.

'Well, I was fast asleep until five... and then I went for a run along the beach.'

'Which beach?' Sam prompted.

'Um...' He looked at the window to his right, tapping his fingers on the table in an effort to remember. 'Venice. Venice Beach.'

'That's the same beach that Deeks surfs at, isn't Sam?' Callen asked.

'Better not be all the time,' Sam growled, and Tane looked taken aback at his reaction.

'Sorry,' Callen apologised for his partner. 'Deeks was shot a few months ago, and Sam has been constantly nagging him to shake up his routine. Deeks has been whining that the surf at the other beaches isn't half as good as Venice.'

'Um, I don't think I've seen him there,' Tane said in an effort to appease Sam.

Sam shrugged. 'He probably spends half his time underwater, anyway.'

'I remember it was Venice Beach because some guy was coming out of a payphone booth, and I didn't see him, and we collided. It was strange... he was coming out of a phone booth, but he was texting on his phone. I mean, if he needed to make a call, you'd think that he'd use his phone.'

'Maybe the tales about radiation causing brain tumours spooked him. You went for a run, and then what?'

'Uh, I got back to my house around a quarter to seven and I took a shower and then had breakfast and then went to work.'

'Can anyone corroborate your whereabouts?' Sam asked, writing something on a piece of paper.

'Uh... Liam.'

'Liam. Liam have a last name?' Callen asked casually, leaning back in his chair, arms resting on the table.

'I... I don't know. He's the guy who serves me every day at Starbucks, every day at six-thirty exactly,' Tane said.

Callen turned to Sam. 'Sometimes it's good to have a routine, Sam. It can provide you an alibi.'

'Yeah, yeah.'

'Look, I know you guys are trying to solve a murder and everything, but I've still got dozens of reports to finish and in some cases _start_ from the _Lincoln_. Can I go?'

'Oh, yeah, sure,' Callen said, standing up and shaking his hand. 'But just to be sure, don't leave town until the investigation is over, yeah? We might need you.'

'Oh, yeah, of course,' Tane said, smiling. 'Thank you, guys. Let me know if there's anything I can do.'

'Sure,' Sam said easily.

'Thank you.' Tane left the room.

'What do you think, Sam?' Callen asked his partner.

'I think he's telling the truth. When he tried to recall which beach, he looked to his right.'

'Which is where you look when you're trying to recall a memory,' Callen agreed. 'If you're lying, you look to the left.'

'Well, we better have Eric check on his alibi,' Sam sighed, moving out into the anteroom of the boatshed.

'Hey, guys,' Eric's voice said, and his face appeared on a plasma screen.

'Okay, I'm convinced that he'd got this place bugged,' Callen grumbled. 'No-one's got that good timing.'

'Except Hetty,' Eric said, interjecting himself into the conversation.

'True,' Sam agreed. 'Except Hetty.'

'What do you want, Eric?' Callen asked.

'Nell was looking at Cortez's phone records and realised that the anonymous call didn't come from a cell phone.'

'What, not a burn phone?' Callen asked.

'Nope,' Eric replied. 'A payphone.'

'A payphone?' Sam asked. 'Who uses a payphone these days?'

'Apparently, people who want to be anonymous. Did you trace the payphone, Eric?' Callen asked.

'Yeah. Traced back to Venice Beach. Sweet swell,' he said, his eyes gaining a distracted, faraway look.

'Hey, Earth to Eric,' Sam called. 'Can you pull up footage of the payphone?'

'Uh, sure. There's a set of traffic lights not far away... there we are. The call is recorded as being made at six twenty seven...' Eric pulled up the footage. A man in a black t-shirt and jeans was stepping into a phone booth. They watched as he made the call.

'Eric, is there a good enough view for facial recognition?' Sam asked.

Eric shook his head and then realised that they couldn't see him because the footage was on the screen. 'No, sorry guys. The angle isn't terrific and the lighting in the phone booth is crap, excusing my French.'

'It's excused,' Callen muttered, examining the video. 'We might be able to get Kensi to lip-read the footage.'

'Yeah, I've gave up on that program after it told me that an arms dealer was apparently asking for three sundaes and a diamond rose in exchange for his arms shipment,' Eric said. 'Turns out that Kensi was right.'

'Don't tell her that,' Sam immediately said. 'You'll be hearing 'I told you so' for weeks.'

'Yeah, I know,' Eric said, recalling the time that she'd been correct on something and had brought it up again and again for the next month. And the others hadn't done anything to stop it!

'Hang on, replay that,' Sam said suddenly, stepping closer to the screen.

'Did you see something?' Callen asked.

'Yeah. Recognise him?' Sam asked, smiling as the man in the phone booth stepped out and directly into the path of a runner who ran straight into him.

'That's Tane!' Callen exclaimed.

They watched as he pulled the man to his feet and then apologised before the man walked off, continuing his texting as Tane ran in the opposite direction.

'It seems as though Tane got a pretty decent look at this guy,' Sam said.

'Maybe he'd be able to describe him,' Eric said, catching on.

'Do you think he'd gone yet?' Callen asked Sam.

'I sure hope not.'

'Hang on, guys, I'll just trace his cell.'

Eric looked down for two seconds to type something into his computer. 'Well, guys, you're in luck. He's still...' He blinked. There was no-one there. 'There.'

**Well, I think the 'good cop, nice cop' technique worked out pretty well, don't you? Review please.**

**XD PurpleHipposRock**


	15. Chapter 15

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 15**

**I own nothin'.**

'_Say what you mean,_

_Tell me I'm right,_

_And let the sun rain down on me...'_

'Hey, Eric,' Kensi said, walking into the operations centre. 'Callen called, said that there was some footage that you wanted me to take a look at.'

'Yeah.' Eric busied himself pulling up the footage as Deeks staggered in under the weight of three boxes of files and evidence, limping under the strain of using only one crutch.

'Don't s'pose you could've helped, Kens?' Deeks asked.

'Nope. You're still being punished for kissing me.'

'Me? You kissed back!'

'Because you started it.'

'Come on!' Deeks dumped the boxes onto the table, where one promptly fell off and spilled its contents over the desk.

'Nice,' Nell said, making a face and picking her way through a pile of CDs. 'What are these?' She picked them up.

'Recordings of what we got off of my wire,' Deeks grunted, taking the other crutch from Kensi. 'Nothing useful, trust me. Whenever he said something useful, I wasn't wearing a wire. But now that I think about it...'

Kensi snorted and turned her attention to the screen. '"Murphy's dead. You know what's good for you, you find her body".'

'Ominous,' Deeks remarked.

She squinted. '"Why? _Chica_ got shot up with your stuff. They run her blood, they find your stuff. It's on your head. Find her." Very ominous.'

'Cortez was telling the truth,' Deeks said grumpily, folding his arms as best he could while still using the crutches for support.

'_Tane_ was telling the truth,' Kensi said.

Nell glanced up apologetically. 'We found out where the money came from.'

'Where?' Deeks asked.

'A part time job.'

'Oh. Damn it. I think we owe Tane an apology, Deeks,' Kensi said sheepishly.

'We'll say sorry next time we see him, Fern,' Deeks promised.

'Don't call me Fern,' Kensi immediately snapped. 'What else have you guys got?'

'Well... not much,' Nell said timidly.

'Anything, Nell. This is one of us. We can't let them get away,' Kensi said determinedly.

Deeks sighed. 'We have to look at this differently. We've assumed that this has something to do with Murphy's investigation into drugs on board the _Lincoln_.'

'What are you thinking?' Eric asked.

'Well, there are two reasons to kill someone. Two motives. There are ten million variations of them, but they all boil down to those two motives. Love or money.' Deeks began to pace up and down the OSP Centre with a 'click' of his crutches and then a 'thud' of his non-injured foot.

'And we've been through the money motive. We keep thinking that she was killed because of drug dealers selling poisoned drugs on the _Lincoln_, the _money_ motive,' Kensi said. 'But love?'

'Did Murphy have a boyfriend?' Deeks proposed.

'Uh... try girlfriend,' Eric said slowly.

Deeks suddenly stood still, and his eyes brightened. 'Oh... she's...'

'Try _different_, Deeks,' Kensi said slowly.

'Yeah. She's different.'

'_Was_ different,' Nell corrected.

'Was she with someone?' Kensi asked.

'I've no clue,' Eric said.

'Try her phone records,' Deeks offered. 'I once had a girlfriend who'd call me on the hour, every hour from seven in the morning until nine at night.'

'Clingy, much?' Kensi commented.

Deeks smiled. 'Oh, she was worth it. She even bought Monty treats.'

'Don't wanna know, Deeks.'

'I guess not. It'd make you jealous.'

'You wish.'

'I totally do. You and her fighting... Makes a great mental image,' Deeks sighed.

'Deeks.'

'Yeah?'

'Shut up.'

'Shutting up.'

'Pulling up her phone records both home and cell,' Eric commentated, tapping quickly. 'She called Hetty a lot.'

'Yeah. _Bad_ mental image,' Deeks commented.

'And another female agent.'

'How many female agents around here are... different?' Deeks asked.

'Enough,' Kensi said.

Deeks looked at her over his shoulder and you could basically _see_ him drooling. 'Really, really, really, good mental image.'

'Ugh!' Kensi punched him in the shoulder.

Deeks' head snapped back to the front. 'Sorry. I'll shut up again.'

'Good boy. Agent Amy Carlson,' Kensi read. 'There have been calls after hours, to homes...'

'Me thinks there might be more than what meets the eye,' Deeks said whimsically.

'Of course you do,' Kensi groaned.

'Address, Eric,' Deeks said.

'Sure,' Eric said, typing busily. 'Oh, God...'

'What now, Eric?' Kensi asked, a tone of foreboding colouring her voice.

'The burglar alarm has been going off for the last thirty minutes, and the front door has been smashed in.'

…

'Oh, God,' Callen groaned, pulling up out the front of Agent Carlson's suburban home.

'That's not good,' Sam said, leaning across Callen to look out of his open window.

'Second wrecked home in two days,' Deeks said uneasily. 'Anyone else feel that sense of foreboding?'

'No,' Kensi said.

'Do you just live to disagree with me?' Deeks asked.

'No. Just when it comes to things like this.'

'Come on, guys,' Callen sighed through the Comm. 'I don't care what the hell is going on in your personal lives right now, I just wanna make sure that Carlson is alive. Because I'm sick of visiting the damn morgue.'

'Agreed,' Deeks immediately said. 'How about it, Kensi? We'll behave.'

'I've been waiting for that for the last six months,' Kensi groaned.

'Kensi?'

'Agreed, Deeks. Most definitely.'

'Thank you,' Callen said. 'Right, we'll take the front, you guys take the back.'

'You guys are just taking the front because the door's already busted,' Deeks complained, hobbling out of the car on his crutches.

'You guys are younger,' Sam said.

'We're injured,' Kensi complained.

'We're hobbling.'

'We're burnt.'

'We have an inability to kick down people's back doors.'

'Alright, alright,' Sam said, holding up his hands. 'You guys can take the front. We'll go to the back.'

'Thank you,' Deeks said, leaning one crutch against the car and using his free hand to draw his Beretta.

'This is not gonna go well,' Kensi muttered.

'Relax, Fern,' Deeks commanded.

'You're about to breach a house on crutches and limping,' Kensi pointed out.

'Huh... You may have a point there,' Deeks said after a moment of thinking.

'How about I go first?'

'Good plan.'

'Yeah. I thought so.'

'Come on.' They slowly approached the house, Deeks' crutch making an occasional click on the gravel path.

'Sh,' Kensi whishted, putting a finger to her lips.

'Not my fault,' Deeks whispered back, moving to the grass.

'Ready?' Callen's voice reverberated through the Comm.

'Ready,' Kensi and Deeks echoed.

Sam chuckled. 'That's Densi for you.'

'Okay, three, two one, go.'

Silently, Kensi moved into the house, looking right, while Deeks entered behind her, eyeing the room to the left. Nodding 'clear' at one another, whispering it into their comms, they switched places, a well-practised and synchronised ballet.

In unison, they released the breath that they'd been subconsciously been holding ever since they'd entered the house as Sam and Callen's shouts of 'clear' and holstered their weapons, exchanging a glance to confirm that the other was as they had been before they'd entered the house.

'Clear,' Kensi echoed the men's cry, in almost exact unison with Deeks'.

'What happened here?' Deeks asked.

'That's a good question,' Callen said, stepping into the deserted living room where Deeks was examining a smashed frame encasing a photo of two attractive women with their arms around each other's waist, a smile of happiness and delight adorning their faces like a row of twinkling lights on a Christmas tree.

Suddenly, Sam's exclamation of surprise rang through the house. 'Guys! We're gonna need an ambulance.'

'Why?' Deeks asked.

'I've found Carlson, and she's in bad shape.'

Callen fled the room, Kensi close on his heels. Deeks made impressive time on his crutches and Kensi reflected later that if she hadn't been there to catch him before he fell as he stopped abruptly in the doorway, he'd probably be in a wheelchair instead of just crutches.

'Oh, my God,' Kensi whispered, looking upon the limp body which lay on the floor of the bathroom, head back, eyes closed, blood soaking the tiles.

'Her pulse is thready and it took me a good ten seconds to find it, but she's alive.'

'I'll get Eric on an ambulance,' Deeks said quickly, stepping out of the room in an effort to distance himself from the gory scene which had presented itself to them. He couldn't make the connection to the bright young woman with the sparkly smile in the photograph to the woman who lay limp and bleeding on the tiles of the bathroom of which he had just stepped out of.

'Eric?' He was sure that Eric had heard everything over the comms, but it had been the best excuse he could give at short notice to step out of that unfortunately memorable scene. 'You get that? Carlson's in bad shape.'

'Ambulance will be with you in two, Deeks,' Eric said quietly. 'How bad is it?'

'Shot. I don't think it was anything major, because she's still alive, but there's a hell of a lot of blood. Too much blood.'

'Deeks?' Callen stepped out of the bathroom, wiping gore onto his jeans. 'You okay?'

'I… I'll be fine.'

Callen snorted. 'You're as bad as Kensi, you know that?'

Deeks sighed. 'It's a hell of a lot of blood.'

'But she's alive and fighting.'

'It's still a hell of a lot of blood.'

'Deeks, you're not queasy about blood.'

'No.'

'That wasn't a question.'

'That was an absolute and definable statement,' Deeks agreed. 'It's just… It sickens me to see someone of _our_ kind, someone who tries to do good for the sake of others no matter the price, like _that_, at the mercy of bad men.'

Callen gently patted him on the shoulder, aware of the gore still present on his hands, understanding what Deeks was feeling. 'She's still alive, Deeks. And when she's awake and talking and mending, she'll help get justice, both for herself _and_ Murphy, yeah?'

'Yeah,' Deeks sighed, following Callen back into the bathroom.

'Hey,' Kensi said, pulling on black crime scene gloves. Her eyes flicked over him and Deeks knew that she was making no effort to mask her concern for her partner. He managed a weak smile, only part of what he usually flashed at her, but she seemed satisfied with that, and looked back to the pair of tweezers she held in her hand.

'Ambulance will be here in two,' Deeks said, purposely looking away from the scene of Sam basically holding Carlson together. 'What's up, Kens?'

'Bullet,' Kensi said, holding up the small metal object. 'What calibre did Rose say Murphy was shot with?' She purposely lowered her voice for that question, not sure how unconscious Carlson was.

'She didn't. The bullet was mushed, so I told her to send it to Abby in DC. She'd probably have some luck with it,' Callen said.

'I'll call her,' Kensi said.

'I'll go wait for the paramedics,' Deeks quickly offered, catching a glance of Carlson's tortured expression in the mirror.

'I'll come with you,' Kensi said, and the partners walked out of the room together. Kensi pulled up a number from her phone and dialled it, putting the phone on speaker as they travelled through the house.

The first sign there was of someone answering was the pounding of heavy techno-metal music.

'Sweet music,' Deeks commented.

'Well thank you. This is Abby speaking,' said a very bright voice.

'Hey Abby. This is Kensi in LA.'

'Hey, Kensi! Long time since we spoke. Wasn't it-'

'When you were kidnapped.'

'Oh, yeah. That was scary.'

'But you're alright now.'

'Hi, I don't think we've met,' Deeks said, wading into the tension-filled waters. 'I'm Marty.'

'Hey, Marty. Got a last name?'

'Deeks. I'm LAPD.'

'Okay, you _sound_ cute, but your picture's much cuter.'

'Why, gee, thanks Abby.'

'Okay, Abby. We sent you a bullet,' Kensi interrupted, ignoring Deeks when he mouthed 'Cop blocker' at her.

'Oh, you mean the mush?'

'Yeah, the mush. From what I could tell, it looked like a 9 mil slug.'

'Very good, Agent Blye. Then again, you're a chick that knows her guns, right? The closest I could get to identifying it was a Beretta. Other than that, it's too mushed.'

'Beretta? That's a cop gun.'

'You'd know. You won't let me use yours.'

'It's a gun thing.'

'Not a guy thing?'

'Kensi!'

'Guys!' Abby's voice echoed down the hallway. 'You can flirt later.'

'Abby, there's been another shooting and I've found another slug. It's a 9 mil too.'

'Beretta?'

'Can't tell. Need to get it under a microscope.'

'Can you take some pictures and get them to me?'

'Uh, sure.' Kensi snapped a few pictures and sent them. 'Going your way now.'

There was a ding on her end. 'Ah! I've got mail. Yeah, that's a 9 mil but…'

'But?' Deeks prompted.

'It's not a Beretta. It's a SIG.'

'SIG like we use?' Kensi asked.

'Yup,' Abby said. 'It's weird. The first murder was a cop's gun, next was an agent's gun…'

'Okay, thanks Abs. We'll get the actual evidence to you ASAP,' Kensi said. 'Gotta go. We'll let you know what happens.'

'Cool,' Abby said. There was another ding at her end. 'Ooh. I got another ding! Gibbs will be here soon. I gotta guys. Nice to meet you, Marty.'

'Nice to meet you too, Abby.'

'Bye, Abs.'

'Bye Kensi.' She hung up.

'Nice person,' Deeks commented.

'Yeah,' Kensi agreed. 'Cop's gun. Agent's gun.'

'This isn't sounding good,' Deeks said uneasily.

'There's the ambulance,' Kensi said, pointing.

'Good.' Deeks sighed. 'Let's hope she makes it through this.'

…

**This chapter's a little longer than usual, I hope you like it.**

**As usual, reviews mean love! I don't suppose I can have seven this time? After all, seven is a lucky number, and with enough luck, everyone will make it out of this story in one piece. Unless Barry (the invisible purple plot hippo) has other ideas…**

**XD PurpleHipposRock**


	16. Chapter 16

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 16**

**I don't own them (obviously, or this would be an episode by now).**

**A warning here: This chapter is rated 'M' and features some offensive language (about two words). Recommended for mature audiences…**

'_Give me a sign,_

_I want to believe...'_

'She was alive when the paramedics took her away,' Callen informed Hetty, walking into the OPS Centre.

'Thank goodness,' Hetty said. 'I couldn't bear to lose two agents in one week.'

Callen gently patted her on the shoulder. 'So, Abby says that Murphy was killed by a 9 mil Beretta and Carlson was shot by a 9 mil SIG.'

'The only connection being that those guns are popular with law enforcement,' Hetty said. 'Has Abby run the ballistics?'

'She says that there isn't enough for the first bullet.'

'So try with the second,' Hetty reasoned.

'We sent it to ballistics. There's no time to send it to Abby.'

'Where are the others?' Hetty inquired.

'Downstairs. I told them to go home, get some rest, but they all refused. Deeks basically sat down and passed out, I don't think he slept last night.'

'With what's been happening with him and Miss Blye over the past couple of days, I don't blame him. What about the others?'

'Kensi's trying to get some rest, I don't think she slept either, and Sam went to get some food. None of us had lunch.'

'This job is not good for your health, I've learnt,' Hetty said. 'You should go get some sleep as well.'

Callen nodded. 'You'll wake us if something comes up?'

'Of course, Mr Callen,' Hetty promised. 'Mr Beale will definitely see to that.'

'Okay… Hetty?'

'Yes, Mr Callen?'

'Are you alright?'

'One can never get used to losing agents. Of course not.'

'_You little twit! You stupid, little brat!'_

_Marty recoiled, but was too slow to completely dodge his father's brutal blow. This, in retrospect, was probably a good thing. If his father had missed completely, he'd have just gotten hit again. And probably harder. As it was, the blow had knocked him on his ass and knocked the breath out of his lungs. He said nothing, having realised by now that replying with one of his smart-ass comments was just another way to get the lights punched out of him. The last time his voice had gotten away from him and snapped out one of his remarks, he'd ended up with two broken ribs and a rather nasty bruise along his side that had stayed in place for almost a month. _

_He scrambled backwards, towards the cupboards and away from his mother, trying to lead his father away from her so as not to get her hurt._

'_Steal from my wallet!' his father blundered at top volume. 'I'll teach you to steal from me!'_

'_I never took anything,' Marty replied, trembling slightly._

'_Of course you did!' Gordon John Brandel yelled, shaking a fist at him before applying said fist to his son's cheekbone._

_Two freaking dollars. That's all it was. Just to repay his overdue fees at the library. It's not like _he_ would've spent it on anything worthwhile anyway. Just booze, booze and more booze._

'_You would've just spent it on more fucking alcohol,' Marty mouthed off before blanching and realising that he'd just said that last thing aloud._

'_I'll teach you to talk back to me!' his father screamed, taking the shotgun, the one that he'd once upon a time, a long time ago, won first place in a competition with. That was, of course, before he started to drink. A time when everyone was actually happy._

_Marty cried out in fear as his father pointed the double-barrel at him, cruelty shining like cold stars in his slightly unfocused eyes. He scrambled backwards a few more feet before coming into hard contact with a cabinet._

_Brandel's eyes narrowed as he took aim, the large weapon shaking slightly in his alcoholic hands._

'_Leave him alone! He's only a boy! He's your son!' his mother cried, running forwards and throwing herself at him. This gave Marty the distraction he needed to be able to clamber to his feet. He winced in sympathy pain as his father threw her off effortlessly. She rammed into the wall and fell into a heap, unconscious._

_Marty's heap leaped into his throat. Was she…? No, she couldn't be. He had to get to her. He had to make sure that she was okay. He couldn't let what happened to his sister happen to her. They'd put about the story that she'd run away. In his own mind, he snorted. If only that was the truth._

'_Exactly,' his father snarled in his rough, gravelly voice. 'He's my son. And he should learn to obey his father.'_

_Marty turned and looked in desperation at the cabinet behind him. And his heart jumped at the sight of the small pistol just lying haphazardly where his father had thrown it the night before collapsing into a drunken stupor. He snatched it up with trembling hands and pointed it at his father._

'_Drop the gun,' he demanded in trembling, high tones. It was just by pure luck and ten million viewings of westerns and action movies that little Marty knew which way to point the gun, let alone what the trigger did. This was the first time he'd ever held a gun in his small, sweaty hands, and he was scared._

_His father laughed; a rumbling, horrific sound. 'You'd never shoot me.'_

'_Do you want to see?' Marty asked. He was running on pure adrenaline alone – the pain that was supposed to be throbbing in his side was barely a twinge._

'_Go on then, Martin. Go on. Shoot your father.' He lowered the shotgun and held it loosely by his side._

_Marty held up the pistol… and then hesitated._

_His father snorted. 'I thought so. Gutless, like _her_. Cowardly, like _her_.' Marty shook at the reference to his sister, who would be sixteen if she were alive. 'It's time to take care of you.' He held up the shotgun and pointed it at him. 'Go on, Marty-boy. Run, like she tried to.' He laughed cruelly and Marty shrank away from the sound. 'Goodbye.' _

_It was as if he was moving in slow motion and Marty was moving ever so slightly faster. Because Marty had his pistol up faster than his father and before he knew it…_

…_he'd pulled the trigger._

_He stood there, numb, as his father dropped the shotgun and put his hand to the bleeding wound in his side. His eyes widened in shock, horror and (dare Marty even think it?) a little bit of admiration. But only the tiniest hint, and only for a moment._

_And then he lurched forwards._

'_I'll kill you!' he bellowed, taking firm hold of the quaking Marty and shaking him firmly._

Hang on… this wasn't how this went… He fell… He knocked his head and passed out,_ Marty thought frantically, trying to escape his father's clutches._

'_Marty!' he growled, shaking him. And he kept shaking him. 'Marty!' One last shake and this would be over, yes? 'Deeks!'_

Deeks sat bolt upright, panting heavily. His wide, scared eyes found his partner's as she released him from her grasp, relieved that he'd finally woken up from what seemed to be a horrific nightmare. He swallowed heavily before wiping dampness from his cheeks. Had he been crying? He hoped not.

'Are you okay?' she gasped, drawing back slightly.

He nodded. 'Yeah, I'm okay.' _Besides the vivid clearness of that damn nightmare._

'You were gonna fall off of the couch,' Callen said from his own chair. Kensi's calls to Deeks had woken both he and Sam up, and they were both looked over at Deeks with concern evident in their eyes.

'Nightmare,' Deeks said, getting up and grabbing his crutches. 'I've gotta get some air.'

'Deeks.' Kensi held out a hand and placed it gently on his chest, stopping him from moving any further.

'I'm okay,' he lied, wiping his face with the palms of his hands. 'I just gotta get some air.' He sidestepped around her and headed towards the door.

'What was that about?' Sam asked.

'He whispering something,' Callen said. 'What was it?'

Kensi took a halting breath before avoiding eye contact with her colleagues as she left the building.

She leaned against the wall next to him.

'You wanna-?' she asked after a moment of silence.

'No,' Deeks said immediately.

'You didn't know what I was gonna say.'

'You wanted me to talk about it. I don't wanna.'

She took a breath. 'You kept saying "please don't hurt me, leave me alone". "Please don't hurt me, leave me alone." "Please don't hurt me, leave me"-'

'Stop it!' Deeks cried out, placing a hand on her mouth. 'Just please. Stop it.' He was almost begging.

'Stop what?' Kensi challenged. 'Stop saying that, or stop it hurting?'

Deeks sighed and looked away.

'Hey!' Kensi stamped her foot. 'Look at me.'

He purposely looked even further away.

She sighed and stood in front of him, toe to toe. 'Hey. Come on, look at me.' She gently reached out and tilted his head towards her. 'Come on. Please?'

He looked at her and her heart broke. 'I can't talk about it, Kens.'

She could see that it wasn't the case, but she gave him the escape route anyway. 'Bad case?'

'Very bad,' he agreed after a moment of hesitation. 'It only happens once in a blue moon.'

'You know that if you need to talk, you can?'

'I know. I really do, Kens.' He gave her a brief smile.

'Okay.'

Neither moved, and then finally Deeks said, 'Are you gonna move, or do I have to kiss you again?'

She rolled her eyes with a smile and punched him in the shoulder. 'Come on. If we're lucky, something came up while we were gone.'

'I hope so.' He slid an easy hand into hers, and she just as easily evaded him, entering the foreclosed building alone.

Suddenly, a whistle pierced the air. 'Guys! Abby got something!'

Glances were exchanged before the team dashed upstairs (well, Deeks more limped, but you get the picture).

'Hey, Abby,' Callen said. 'You got something?'

On the big screen, Abby nodded. 'Yeah. I took that picture of the non-smushed bullet and cleaned it up and there was enough detail to run it through the database.'

'Wow,' Eric said. 'Good job, Abby.'

'You haven't heard the best bit yet,' Abby said brightly. 'I got a match!'

'Awesome!' Deeks said, brightening immediately.

'Hey, Marty.'

'Hey Abby. Who's the match?'

'No time for sweet talk?'

'I've always got time for sweet talk,' Deeks replied.

Kensi sighed. 'Abby, please don't encourage him.'

'Sorry,' she apologised. 'Recognise this guy?'

She pulled up a picture.

'Oh, my God. That's impossible.' Sam's face paled.

'That's totally impossible. Are you totally sure, Abby?' Callen asked.

'Totally. I ran it twice. Why?'

'Because Agent Dominic Vale is dead.' Kensi's emotional words echoed empty.

Deeks looked around the room. 'I feel like I'm missing something,' he said.

'So do I,' Abby echoed.

'Dom… went… before you came,' Kensi said to Deeks.

'Dom… sounds like you knew him well.'

'Not really.'

'Good kid. Got in over his head. Took a short-cut one day. Bad idea,' Sam muttered. It still stung.

'He was my old partner,' Kensi told Deeks. 'Before you. He disappeared before you came and we found him after you left to do your little undercover stunt that we had to save you from.'

'You found him?' Deeks asked.

'Yeah. Then he died.'

'Oh… I'm sorry. No wonder you called me 'temp',' Deeks said, turning to Sam apologetically.

'Water under the bridge,' Sam said, waving a nonchalant hand.

'Still, I'm sorry.'

'Apology accepted.'

'Well, where is his gun if he's dead?' Abby asked.

'We found it in the car and logged it as evidence,' Kensi said. 'It should be in the evidence locker here.'

'Checking it,' Eric said, and quickly typed something into the computer. 'According to the logs, it's here.'

'Here?' Callen prompted.

'In evidence,' Eric said. 'Hasn't moved since it got logged in.'

'Well, it must've, because Carlson was not shot last year. She was shot today.'

Abby sighed. 'I seem to have created more questions than answers,' she said.

'Yes, you have,' Kensi said. 'Oh, well. Thanks, Abby.'

'No problem. Call me if you need anything.' She hung up.

'I'm gonna go check the evidence locker, see if it really is there,' Kensi said.

'I'll come,' Deeks offered.

'Well, before you do, did you get anything from your files on Teddy the Shredder?' Callen asked.

They both stopped in the doorway.

'If we did, we don't know it,' Kensi said. 'Went through those damn files twice. Found nothing.'

'O-kay,' Callen sighed. 'Where'd you put them? Sam and I will go through them.'

'They're on my desk,' Deeks said.

'Bye guys,' Kensi said, and Deeks followed her out of the door.

Kensi paused before opening the box.

'You okay?' Deeks asked, noting her hesitation.

'I… It's nothing.'

'Doesn't seem like nothing.'

'It's like your nightmare, Deeks. I can't talk about it.'

He nodded. 'Okay.'

Kensi pulled out a pair of gloves from her pocket and put them on before pulling out the cardboard box containing her ex-partner's weapon. She sat it on a ledge before opening it.

'Well, it's still here,' Deeks said. 'That's a start.'

Kensi paused before checking the barrel. 'Yeah, but here's the thing. It hasn't been fired.'

'Huh… weird.'

'Very. We better take it with us,' Kensi said, putting it back in the box. She walked to the entrance. 'Max, we'll check this out, please.'

'Yup. You know the deal.'

'Yup.' Kensi scrawled her name, signature and the logging number that had been stamped on the box.

'Hey, Tane was here just a few minutes ago,' Deeks said, gesturing to a name a few lines above hers.

'He didn't sign for anything,' Kensi said, adding the time of her visit to the last column.

'Yeah, he said just wanted to check something before he went up to do a sketch of a suspect,' Max said.

'Guess he wanted to take advantage of the fact that he was in the place,' Deeks remarked.

'Guess so,' Kensi replied, nodding at Max. 'Thanks Max. I promise, we'll bring it back.'

'Well, you signed for it, so it's on your heads if you don't bring it back.'

'Exactly.'

**Well? Thoughts? Do you know who did it? Do you know who didn't do it? I think Carlson might provide us with some answers in the next chapter…**

**I've got some MAJOR exams coming up in the next few days, which is why I'm updating now… wish me luck!**

**XD PurpleHipposRock**


	17. Chapter 17

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 17**

**Not mine.**

'_Whoa... Mona Lisa, you're guaranteed to run this town,_

_Whoa... Mona Lisa, I'd pay to see you frown!'_

'Hey, guys. Tane was here,' Eric greeted the men.

'Did he do the sketch?' Sam asked.

'Yup,' Eric said, pulling up the result. 'I'm running it through facial rec.'

'Good work,' Callen said.

'Pretty ordinary looking guy,' Eric said, looking at the big screen.

'Yup. But he's our best link,' Sam said. 'Anything on Carlson's condition?'

'Still unconscious,' Eric reported. 'I called the hospital. They said that she should wake up in about an hour.'

'Well, hopefully she'll be able to give us something,' Callen said.

'Until then, let's go through that paperwork. Again,' Sam said.

'Do we have to? I'm getting sick of listening to Deeks' voice on the wire.'

'We'll swap, then. I'll take the wires, you can take the paperwork.'

'Okay,' Callen agreed.

Sam sighed. He wasn't looking forwards to this.

…

Sam looked up as Deeks and Kensi walked (well, one walked, the other limped) into the bullpen.

'Hey, it's Densi,' Callen said. 'What did you get?'

'Gun.' Kensi held the box up.

'Dom's?'

'Funny thing, but,' Kensi said, handing it to him. 'It hasn't been fired.'

'What?' Callen asked. 'That's impossible.'

Sam frowned and examined the barrel and the trigger. 'It's possible if it isn't Dom's gun.'

'What?' Deeks asked. 'Not his gun? How can you tell?'

'It's clean,' Sam said.

'Agent Vale didn't clean his gun?' Deeks asked.

Callen shook his head. 'He was anal about his gun. Cleaned it daily no matter whether he'd used it or not.'

'So what's so weird about it being clean?' Deeks asked.

'He'd fired it just before he'd been taken. No-one's cleaned it. We couldn't, it was evidence,' Kensi said. 'So how is it clean?'

Deeks paused and then shook his head, a disbelieving smile on his face. 'I think I know what Tane was checking.' He took the weapon from Sam and walked out of the bullpen, leaving the three agents sitting there.

'I think the cop's got something,' Callen remarked.

'Should we follow him?' Sam asked.

Kensi shrugged. 'He's probably just trying to get us to look at a weird Youtube clip, but on the off chance that he's actually got something, I think we better go.'

'I heard that!' Deeks' voice echoed from upstairs. 'You might wanna get up here. It isn't a Youtube clip. And it's not Agent Vale's gun.'

The agents exchanged a glance before dashing upstairs.

'What do you mean, not Dom's gun?' Sam demanded the moment he crossed the threshold.

'It's not Dom's gun,' Eric said. 'I ran the serial number. It's definitely not Dom's.'

'Then whose is it?' Callen demanded.

'You'll never guess whose it is,' Eric said excitedly.

'Then tell us,' Kensi said.

'Spoilsport,' Deeks said, sending her a glare. 'Pull it up, Eric.'

Eric pulled up a picture.

'Okay, you're kidding, right?' Callen asked.

'I take it back,' Kensi said. 'We don't owe the kid an apology.'

'We gave him everything he deserves,' Deeks growled.

'I think Tane has more to do with this than we thought. Track him Eric,' Sam demanded.

'Doing it,' Nell said. She sighed and leaned back in her chair. 'No-go. He's turned his phone off.'

'Kaleidoscope,' Kensi reminded them.

'Oh, yeah!' Eric busily began a search.

'What connection does Tane have with this?' Callen asked.

'I've no clue,' Eric said.

'Wrong answer, Eric,' Sam said.

'I will find the answer,' Eric replied.

'Right answer,' Callen said. 'Deeks, there's nothing here on The Shredder. You wasted a year of your life.'

'I almost wasted my life full stop,' Deeks said. 'Callen, I want him.'

'We all want him. He's taken out two agents.'

Suddenly, Callen's phone rang. He tapped a button and answered, 'Callen.' He listened intently for a few moments and then hung up. 'Carlson's awake. Sam and I will go talk to her.'

'What about us?' Deeks asked.

'Dig up anything you can on The Shredder.'

'But we've already done that,' Kensi protested.

'Try again.'

And with that, Callen and Sam were gone.

Kensi sat down at her desk with a huff. 'I hate it when they do that. They used to do that to me and Dom all the time.'

'Do you…' Deeks stopped suddenly. 'Sorry. That's personal.'

'What is it?' Kensi asked curiously.

'I just… Do you miss him? I mean, he was your partner.'

'Yeah, I do miss him. Two years later and it still hurts,' Kensi sighed. 'Then again, the whole partnership thing got a bit confusing for me. He came, stayed for about six months, got taken, you came, you left after a week, we found him, he died saving Sam's life and then _you_ almost died. I started to feel like… I was cursed or something.'

'It's got nothing to do with you,' Deeks said reassuringly. 'Did you…'

'Come on, Deeks. The sooner we get through this, the better.'

'Did you hate me, at the start? For replacing him?'

'You never replaced him,' Kensi said immediately.

Subconsciously, Deeks recoiled.

'Sorry,' Kensi apologised quickly. 'It's just that, you didn't. You made your own little spot in this team. Sure, on paper you filled a hole, but you never replaced him. You were kind of forced onto us rather than replacing anyone.'

Deeks snorted. 'Thanks.'

'Sometimes I think that maybe he's still with us… but that's silly, right?'

Deeks shook his head. 'No. He'll always be with you, Kensi. In the very corner of your mind, that little corner that never gets cleaned, just gets cluttered with all the memories that you're not sure what to do with.'

'That's a nice way of putting it,' Kensi said softly. 'He was a good agent.'

'I kinda understand now why Sam was kind of hostile, when Hetty dumped me into it.'

'"Dumped" is a good word for it.'

Deeks smiled. 'So. Teddy the Shredder.'

'Let's start from the beginning.'

'A very good place to start.'

Kensi ignored him. 'You went under why?'

'Two reasons. I went under officially for the drugs unit, but unofficially, Internal Affairs wanted me to do a little digging into dirty cops.'

'And by the end of it?' Kensi asked.

'At least two dozen cops, agents and people in positions of power either quit or were sacked or at least really badly disgraced. The majority of them were charged and either jailed or paid a hefty fine. All of them got black marks in their records.'

'No wonder he trapped you in a car and slashed your back. That basically would've shut down half his operation.'

'Yup. But really, I only scratched the surface.'

Kensi sighed and leaned back in her chair. Across the room, Deeks replicated her actions.

'This case is confusing.'

'Understatement of the year,' Kensi said. 'I can see why you're the blonde in this relationship.'

'You called it a relationship again.'

'Slip of the tongue,' Kensi said quickly. 'This is most definitely a partnership.'

'Okay. I'll believe that,' Deeks said. 'Though after that kiss that we shared, I'm not sure that I'd class this as just a plain partnership. Maybe partners with privileges?'

'Cute,' Kensi said. 'But no.'

Deeks sighed. 'We've got a dead agent murdered by a cop's gun, presumably by someone who is most likely on Ramirez's pay roll.'

'And another agent shot with a dead agent's gun, presumably by Agent Tane, who took the gun from evidence lock-up,' Kensi sighed.

'How would he have got the gun out without signing it out, though?' Deeks asked.

'Easy. Swap it out with his own.'

'So, we think Tane tried to kill Carlson. But who killed Murphy?'

'A cop? After all, Ramirez has been known to recruit cops.'

'But which cop?'

Kensi shrugged. 'You know more cops than I.'

Deeks shook his head. 'I've no clue. What motive does Ramirez have to kill Murphy and Carlson, but?'

'Well, Murphy was investigating dirty coke, if she linked it back to him, he'd go under.'

'Why would he have gotten Tane and a cop to cover for him, though?' Deeks asked.

'Damn good question,' Kensi said, sinking into her seat.

Eric appeared on the stairs holding a tuba.

'Hey!' Deeks yelled. 'Don't even think about it, buddy.'

Eric looked down on them, disappointment written all over his face.

'What is it, Eric?' Kensi asked.

'I've got something. _Maybe_ who the cop is.'

Deeks and Kensi were both out of their seats and up the stairs in record time.

…

Callen flashed his badge at the LAPD cop guarding Carlson's room. The cop examined it carefully before letting them into her room.

'Agent Carlson?' Sam asked cautiously.

She looked even worse than when they'd found her. She lay limp in the blankets, her eyes closed, and her face wan and pale. Her eyes opened, and she glanced at them before closing her eyes again.

'I'm Agent Hanna, and this is Agent Callen,' Sam said gently.

'I know,' Carlson managed softly, wincing in pain.

'I know it hurts really badly, but we need you to answer a few questions,' Callen said softly.

'I know,' she said again.

'How much did you know about Agent Murphy's case?' Sam asked.

'Everything,' Carlson said in a breathy tone. 'Sara told me everything.' She let out a whimper of pain.

'Did she suspect anything?' Sam questioned.

'At first she was suspicious of this drug dealer, um…'

'Ramirez?' Callen prompted.

She shook her head and winced at the action. 'No, it was, um… Cortez?'

'Antonio Cortez?' Sam asked.

'Yeah,' she sighed. 'That's the one. But after she visited him, she told me that he didn't do it.'

'We know. We checked that out,' Callen said. 'What next?'

'Well, at first she was working with Agent Tane. Young kid, barely a probie,' Carlson continued, wincing at every word or breath.

'We know him,' Callen said. 'What do you mean, at first?'

'After a while, she stopped working with him. Cut all ties. Said that something was off with him, but she couldn't put her finger on it. He was acting strangely but she just thought that that was because he was a little uncomfortable because she was gay.'

'And then?'

'He kept getting weird phone calls. She thought that maybe he might have something to do with this.'

'He did,' Sam said. 'He was the one that shot you.'

'Really?' Carlson asked. 'I don't remember that.'

'It's not your fault. You're doing really well,' Callen said. 'Do you have any idea who Tane was working with? We think he was working with a cop.'

'The only cop I can remember her mentioning was an asshole by the name of… Henry? Haley? I can't remember.' She blinked sleepily.

Callen and Sam exchanged a glance. 'What about him?' Sam asked.

'He wouldn't let her have the crime scene at first… the only one that occurred on land…' She was truly drifting now, and hanging on by a thread. 'And then he was a jerk about her gender… said that women had no place in the police force.'

'Carlson, you've been a really great help,' Callen said. 'Get some rest, get better.'

There was no response, for she was fast asleep.

'Let's go,' Sam said in a low voice.

…

'What is it, Eric?' Kensi asked.

'Well, Nell and I were going through all of Tane's electronic tracks,' Eric said.

'And Eric found that a lot of his calls were coming and going to the LAPD. The only other person who calls the LAPD more than him, in fact, is Deeks,' Nell said.

'Hey, I _am_ an LAPD officer,' Deeks said defensively.

'Yeah, we know,' Kensi said.

'So, we tracked the calls, but all of them were made to the LAPD's main switchboard, which means that we can't track them past there.'

'So, we think that Tane's cop friend is LAPD?' Deeks' hands balled into fists.

'Yeah,' Nell said. 'But there's no way of knowing _which_ LAPD officer it is.'

'Well, you can scratch my name from the list,' Deeks said dryly.

'It was never on it,' Eric assured them, putting the tuba down.

Suddenly, a phone rang. Nell dashed over to it and answered it, putting it on speaker. 'Ops,' she said brightly.

'Nell, it's Callen.' Callen's voice was tinny through the speaker.'

'Callen, its official, Tane's helper is a cop. LAPD in fact. His phone records pretty much confirm it,' Kensi said immediately.

'Well, Carlson confirmed that Tane had something to do with this. Murphy was working with him at first, but pushed him away halfway through. She was suspicious of him.'

'With good reason,' Deeks said. 'Look how she ended up.'

'Look, we asked and the only cop that she can recall is someone called Henry, or Haley.'

Kensi and Deeks exchanged a look before Deeks whirled around and punched his fist into the wall.

'What the hell was that?' Callen asked, while Nell let out a scared yelp.

'We know who it is, Callen,' Kensi said, putting a calming hand on Deeks' shoulder. 'We'll meet you at the LAPD.'

'Who is it, Kensi?' Callen asked, but Kensi hung up the phone.

'Let's get this jerk, Deeks,' she said before leaving the OSP Centre.

'Gladly,' Deeks said, following her.

The ominous strains of Eric playing Beethoven's Fifth on the tuba followed them out of the Mission.

…

**Do do do doooo… Do do do doooo… Muhahaha… The plot hippo (Barry) is lying on his back with his legs in the air looking supremely happy. I think he knows what's going to happen next! (I think he also wants me to scratch his belly, but that'll only happen when he decides to tell me what's going to happen next! Reviews are my bribes. Tickles and food are his.)**

**XD PurpleHipposRock**


	18. Chapter 18

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 18**

**I am only playing with the toys of Shane Brennan's creation. I will put them back with minimal damage. (Before you say anything, sprained ankles and burns do heal.)**

'_Say what you mean,_

_Tell me I'm right,_

_And let the sun rain down on me...'_

'Harvey!' Deeks' low, masculine growl sent a chill down Kensi's spine.

'Deeks, we should've waited for Callen and Sam.'

'No way is the bastard getting away with this for another second,' Deeks grunted with the effort of moving with the crutches.

'Deeks,' Kensi said entreatingly, following him out of the elevator and into the dull atmosphere of the LAPD.

'Harvey!' Deeks was yelling now, having caught the unfortunate man in his sights.

'Deeks,' Harvey said smoothly, ignoring the fury in the younger man's eyes and tone.

'You bastard,' Deeks growled. 'You turncoat, murdering bastard.' He dropped the crutches with a clatter and continued forwards towards the other man.

'Deeks!'

'Come on, Deeks, listen to your girl,' Harvey taunted him. 'You're never gonna get in her pants if you don't listen to her _feelings_.'

Kensi's eyes widened in fury and she started forwards before Deeks caught her in his arms.

'Let _go_ of me, Deeks,' Kensi said, glaring at Harvey.

'I'd love to watch you kick him in the nuts again, Princess, but I don't think he'd have children if you did it again. You are, after all, wearing steel-toed boots.'

'I'd be doing any potential kids of _his_ a favour,' Kensi hissed. If looks could kill, Harvey would most likely be dead twice over. And then be turned into a pile of ashes on the floor.

'I really do agree, Kens, but I think a murder charge coupled with meddling with a federal investigation will have to do,' Deeks said.

The station, which had been pretty quiet up until that point now dropped into dead silence. You could hear a pin drop.

'Good idea, Deeks. If you'd let me go…'

'Of course, my Sweet.' Deeks released her arms, and she brandished her handcuffs with relish.

'You see, this is why we keep getting our cover blown.' Kensi smiled sweetly at Harvey as she tugged his resisting arms behind his back.

'What?' Deeks asked.

'Your stupid nicknames.' The cuffs closed with a satisfying click. 'You have the right to remain silent,' she said to Harvey with a sweet smile. 'Anything you say or do can be used against you in court. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford one, one will be appointed to you.'

'Nicely said, Fern,' Deeks said to her.

'I told you Deeks, stop calling me Fern.'

'Why? I know you love it.'

'That might be what _you_ think.'

'That's what everyone thinks.' They disappeared into the elevator with only Harvey as the unwilling witness to their flirting.

…

Callen chuckled, reviewing the footage of Harvey's arrest on the LCD screen in the boatshed.

'Nice,' he said to the pair. 'You did the job, scared him and humiliated him.'

'Plus, he's now got the reputation of being a dirty cop,' Deeks said. 'I mean, no-one likes a dirty cop. _I'm_ not liked, but that's because I'm so good at busting dirty cops, but the dirty cops, they're well and truly _hated_.'

'We like you,' Kensi said.

'You do?' Deeks asked, eyes wide and full of hope.

Sam shrugged. 'Ah, you've grown on us,' he said nonchalantly.

'Like ringworm,' Kensi and Callen added, deadpan.

'Exactly,' Sam said, looking at them in surprise.

'Aw, come on, guys,' Deeks said, making large "puppy-dog" eyes at them all.

'Those only work on Kensi, Deeks,' Callen said before disappearing down the hall into the interrogation room.

'Don't worry, Deeks,' Sam said, clapping him on the shoulder. 'I like you a little. You're not bad.'

'A little?' Deeks asked, pouting. 'Come on, guys.'

'Tough break, buddy,' Kensi said, patting him on the shoulder before perching on the table.

'I'm not really feeling the love right now, Kens,' Deeks said.

'What love?' Kensi feigned confusion.

'Very funny,' Deeks said, rolling his eyes. 'But you kissed back. I shall forever remember that. _You kissed back_.'

'Remember it, bud, cos that's the last of any sugar you get from me,' Kensi smiled at him.

Deeks shook his head. 'Ooh, I doubt it.'

'You wish, you mean.'

'Bit of both. Mixed in with a dash of hope and a good dollop of flirtation.'

'Puh-leeze,' Kensi said, gagging. 'Stop before I drown in my own vomit.'

'Really classy, Kens. _Real_ classy.'

'Shut up, Deeks.' Kensi flicked the television on, and it revealed Callen sitting calmly in the corner reading messages on his phone while Sam shoved Harvey up against the wall.

'On the other hand…' Kensi turned the television off.

'Plausible deniability,' Deeks said, nodding.

'We didn't see anything.'

'See what?'

…

'Where's Tane?' Sam asked.

Harvey took a strangling gasp. 'I don't know.'

'Liar, liar,' Callen sang softly in the background.

'We know that you're working for Ramirez, along with Tane.' Sam narrowed his eyes at the smaller man.

'I wouldn't do anything-'

Callen sneezed violently. A little too violently. 'Liar,' he said again. 'Lies make me sneeze.'

'He's allergic, you see,' Sam said quite kindly to the man, well, as kindly as you could when you were shoving them up against a wall by their throats. 'It's why he quit the CIA.'

'It was like I had hay-fever all year long,' Callen said, shaking his head. 'I ended up claiming my anti-histamines on my taxes. Of course, that ended up with a rather interesting conversation with the IRA.'

'That's not possible,' Harvey choked disbelievingly.

Callen "sneezed" again. 'Not possible?' he asked, blowing his nose violently into a bright handkerchief. 'It's happening right now!'

'So tell the truth and my partner here will stop sneezing and will hopefully not spread his germs onto you, where they could manifest and turn into a cold. Explain your connection to Ramirez.'

'He'll kill me,' Harvey gasped.

Callen chuckled. 'Now, that we believe. However…' He got up from his seat and opened a hatch in the floor of the interrogation room. 'Would you rather Ramirez get you, or the sharks? They haven't been fed for a while, have they, Sam?'

'No. Not since… hmmm… The Iranian, or the Chechen?'

'The Iranian, I think,' Callen said. 'Wasn't that last year?'

'Oh, yes. The sharks will definitely be craving human flesh by now.'

'You… you wouldn't,' Harvey stuttered.

'Oh, no…' Sam said. 'But if you were to… I don't know, slip? After all, we're just showing you our magnificent view.' He pushed Harvey a little towards the hatch. 'Huh?'

'Okay, okay!' Harvey protested. 'I'll talk.'

…

'Now this is what I'm talking about,' Deeks said in the other room, taking some popcorn from the bowl.

'Definitely,' Kensi agreed.

'Better than Top Model?' Deeks asked.

'Definitely,' Kensi agreed again.

'I thought we weren't gonna watch it?'

'I couldn't resist. This is just too good. Plus, it's live. Who knows what's gonna happen?'

'Anything could happen, really.'

They shared a grin.

'This is gonna be good.'

…

Harvey sighed. 'Ramirez approached me two years ago. Said that if I hid the evidence of a certain crime that had already made its way into the evidence lock-up, there could be a sizable amount of cash in it for me. The stock market had just crashed, I was down on my luck and I'd lost my retirement. I was desperate.'

'What about Tane? When'd you meet him?' Callen asked.

'A year later,' Harvey said. 'He'd just been recruited by Ramirez after Ramirez realised that a sizable amount of his product was going to Navy sailors, and it would be beneficial to have an NCIS agent on the payroll. He targeted Tane because Tane was weak, an easy target.'

'Why did he start supplying dirty drugs to sailors?'

'When Ramirez was eighteen, he tried to get a decent start in life and tried to get into the Navy. Unfortunately, he flunked the psych eval. He's had it in for the Navy ever since, and I'm pretty sure he recruited Tane for that very purpose, to kill Navy seamen.'

'Was Tane in on it?' Sam asked.

'Hell yeah. You know Tane's family history with the Navy?'

Both nodded.

'Well, he was pissed that he couldn't get in. He wanted revenge as much as Ramirez. He covered it all up, even did the supplying in some cases. When I found out, I tried to get him to stop, knowing that if NCIS got involved, we could get caught and do some major jail time. He refused. It was like the killing had gone to his head and changed him.'

'So, he kept killing and you just stood aside?' Callen asked suspiciously.

'Yup. Until an agent by the name of Sara Murphy came onto the scene. You see, she was suspicious of both me and Tane, and Ramirez didn't like that. He told me to get a gun that wouldn't be traced, so I got an old one from the very back of evidence lock-up and gave it to Tane. I was determined to not get my hands dirty.'

'So Tane killed Murphy?'

'No. In the end, I did.'

'But you just said…'

'I know what I just said, but in the end, Ramirez had me drive Tane to Murphy's house. When we got there, we went in and she put up a fight. Tane was struggling with her when I found the drugs on the counter and shoved them into her face. She fell unconscious and I just wanted to leave her, figuring that she'd take the message.'

'But…' Sam prompted.

'Tane didn't think so. He thought that she would keep going and he also pointed out that she'd seen our faces. He took the gun and pointed it at her, but when he tried to pull the trigger, he couldn't.'

'Weakness?' Callen asked.

'If you want to call it that,' Harvey said. 'His arguments made sense, so when he froze, I took the gun and performed the deed. Afterwards, I threw the gun into the ocean.'

'And Carlson?' Sam asked.

'Who?' Harvey asked.

'Special Agent Amy Carlson,' Callen said. 'She was shot this morning. We only just managed to save her. Same MO with the gun. He took it from the NCIS lock-up.'

'No. I didn't know he was going to kill her.'

'Shit,' Callen muttered lowly. 'He's cleaning up after himself.'

'He's getting ready to run,' Sam said.

Both rose to go out of the room.

'Hey!' Harvey said. 'What about me?'

'You'll be charged with the murder of a federal agent and the cover-up of the murder of several Navy seamen.'

Harvey sank back down in his seat, only a fraction of the man he had been only days before.

'Tane's running,' Deeks said grimly.

'Yup,' Callen said, helping himself to their popcorn.

'What are we going to do?' Kensi asked.

'Well, we need to find him, obviously,' Sam said, pouring himself a cup of coffee. 'If we can find Dom's gun as well, and link Tane to it, combine that with Harvey's confession and we can prosecute.'

'But how are we going to find him?' Deeks asked.

'Well, Eric's running him and his vehicle through Kaleidoscope,' Kensi said. 'And Nell is tracking him electronically.'

Suddenly, Eric's picture popped up on the LCD screen.

'Yup. He's definitely telepathic,' Callen said. 'What have you got, Eric?'

'Kaleidoscope got a hit on Tane's vehicle. He just left the back-up building,' Eric said. 'He's heading south, towards Santa Monica.'

'What would he be doing, going that way?'

'Well, would he know that we're onto him?' Sam asked.

'Probably. I got the call from you guys telling me that Tane was alive while he was here. Afterwards, he seemed like he was in a hurry to get out of here, but I assumed that that was because he got a call at the same time.'

'Maybe it was both, Eric,' Deeks said. 'You would think that he would head for Canada or Mexico, not the beach.'

Kensi closed her eyes momentarily. 'Deeks, in one of your reports on Ramirez, you mentioned that he had a house on Santa Monica. You know what I would do if someone forced me into becoming a killer and part of the wrong team?'

Deeks' eyes found hers. 'You'd kill 'em. So would I.'

'And, I think, so would Tane. He doesn't know that we've got Harvey. He doesn't know that we're this far into this, that we're really close to catching him. He thinks he'd got time to kill Ramirez and still run for the border.'

Deeks grunted. 'Couldn't we let him kill Ramirez first and _then_ arrest him?'

Callen clapped him on the shoulder before walking past. 'Sorry, Deeks. But you're a good guy, which means that you can't pick and choose.'

Deeks sighed and limped after the rest. 'Fine, but if I get a clear shot and it's justified, I'm taking it.'

'Oh, trust me, after all he's done, we all want to shoot him,' Kensi said.

'Yeah, but some more than others.'

Kensi gently patted him on the arm. 'You'll get your revenge, Deeks. And so will Murphy.'

…

**Well? Reviews please.**

**And if anyone's been paying attention to the song lyrics that appear at the start of every chapter, you might have realised that there are only two more chapters. : ( Sad face…**

**XD PurpleHipposRock**


	19. Chapter 19

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 19**

**I don't own them.**

'_Give me a sign,_

_I want to believe...'_

Deeks stared morosely out onto the surf which crashed onto the shore.

'Feel like going surfing?' Kensi asked, standing next to him and shoving a Kevlar vest into his hands.

'Yeah, just a bit.' Deeks sighed and leaned against the car.

'How are we gonna take this?' Callen asked, getting out of his own car and striding across the street.

'Like always. We knock on the front door and say we're here to see Mr Ramirez and Agent Tane,' Sam said simply.

'What if Tane is trying to kill Ramirez?' Deeks asked.

Callen snorted. 'After what Ramirez has done, I'm all for letting Tane doing whatever he likes to him. However… We better try and talk Tane down.'

'And if Tane's not there?' Kensi asked.

'According to Eric, the last he saw of Tane on Kaleidoscope was right over there,' Callen said, pointing to a set of streetlights down the street.

'So, he's most likely there,' Deeks summarized. 'But what if he isn't?'

'We arrest Ramirez instead,' Callen said, 'And then go and find Tane so that we've got evidence against him.'

'Can I arrest Ramirez?' Deeks asked, almost like a kid asking for a treat.

Callen allowed himself a smile. 'Yes, Deeks. That pleasure is all yours.'

'Can I punch him?' Kensi asked.

'No, Kensi.'

Kensi pouted.

Deeks blinked at the sight of her. 'You're pouting again.'

'So what?' She continued her facial expression.

'It's cute.'

Kensi blinked and stared at him in amazement. 'Cute? Cute? Really?'

'Really, truly, cross my heart.' He did so with difficulty, considering the crutches.

Sam sighed. 'Come on, guys.'

'We got a warrant, so don't bother with the formalities,' Callen said, striding up to the front door.

'NCIS!' Sam yelled, cocking his own weapon. 'We have a warrant!' No reply. They weren't waiting for one.

Sam knocked down the door, and made it look so effortless that Deeks envied him.

'Kensi, Deeks, up- oh, hang on.' Callen shook his head as he watched Deeks limp in on one crutch. 'Downstairs. Sam and I will go up.'

'Nice call,' Kensi said dryly, before heading off to clear a room.

Together, the pair checked the bottom half of the house.

'Clear!' Kensi's voice rang out through the empty bottom half of the house.

'Clear!' Callen echoed.

'Clear!' Sam repeated.

'Not so clear,' Deeks called. 'Kitchen. Now!'

There was a thudding sound as all three agents made their way downstairs and into the empty kitchen. They found Deeks kneeling in a pool of blood next to a dying Tane.

'Get an ambulance.' Deeks' empty voice reverberated in the small space.

'Don't… bother…' Tane choked out, blood appearing in the corner of his mouth before trickling down.

'Tane-' Kensi began, but he cut her off, holding up a blood splattered phone and pressing it into her palm.

'He got me,' he spluttered. 'Ramirez got me. I shouldn't have… been so… weak.' Tane was clearly hanging on by a quickly deteriorating thread.

'You are not weak, Tane,' Callen said. 'You got past us, all the way until now.'

'You know… what I've done,' he sighed. 'I'm sorry.' He swallowed and gagged on the metallic, bitter blood filling his mouth. 'Ramirez. He started it all. It's all his…' But his lungs contracted for the last time, and his last breath left his body, leaving him lying pale, bloody and dead on the floor of a murderer's kitchen.

'Fault,' Deeks ended sadly.

Callen reached out silently, and gently closed Tane's staring eyes. None of them could really stomach the idea of having him watch them blindly with his unseeing eyes.

'Ramirez must have fled,' Kensi said, turning away from the scene before her.

Sam stood straight. 'He can't get far. I'll get Eric to get onto him. Hopefully, he won't have gotten out of the city yet.'

Deeks stood up and Kensi shied away from him, looking at his blood-drenched jeans and smeared vest.

'I think I might need to change,' Deeks said quietly.

'Your clothes are in my car,' Kensi said and walked out of the kitchen.

He silently followed her.

'Are you okay?' she asked, shoving the bag at him.

'Yeah. Are you?' he asked, stripping off the vest and placing it on the ground.

'I guess. It's just… that felt like a repeat of Dom, all over again.'

'I'm sorry,' Deeks said, reaching out with a compassionate hand.

Kensi shied away from him, and when he looked at his hand, he could see why.

'I'm sorry,' he apologised again.

'That's okay,' Kensi said. 'It's just… the blood.'

'I think I'll go in and get changed,' Deeks said, heading back into the house.

'Good idea,' Kensi said quietly, watching him limp back into the house. 'Where are your crutches?'

'I dropped them,' Deeks said in surprise, as though he'd missed them.

Kensi shook her head. 'I'll get them for you.'

Deeks shook his head. 'It's okay. They're probably covered in blood anyways. I'll just make do.'

'If you're sure,' Kensi said uncertainly before leaving him to go back to the other guys.

'I am,' he said, before disappearing into a bathroom and stripping off his outer clothes. He looked at himself once in the mirror before scrubbing the blood off of his arms and legs, paying careful attention to his hands, and dressing in clean clothes.

'That's better,' Kensi said quietly as he returned to them, stepping around the pools of blood.

'Feels better,' he replied. 'What've you got?'

'Tane gave me his phone. I don't know why.' Kensi clicked it on. 'Strange. He's got it on a recording app that's on all NCIS standard issue phones.'

'You think maybe…?' Callen's voice trailed off as they realised the implications of this.

'Maybe… if we're very, very lucky,' Kensi said. 'I'll check his recordings… There's only one here. Made… eight minutes ago.'

'Play it,' Callen ordered.

She pressed a button, and instantly a voice filled the kitchen that made Deeks' skin crawl.

'_So, Tane. You've come back, finally. Is she dead?' _Ramirez asked.

There were a couple of taps, as if Tane had walked forwards a couple of steps._ 'I put a bullet into her.'_

'Hang on,' Kensi said, stopping the recording. 'Harvey shot Murphy in the head. But Tane shot Carlson in the stomach, giving her a chance to live. A very slim one, but one none the less. It's almost as if-'

'He wanted us to catch him,' Deeks finished quietly.

'Press play, Kens,' Callen said.

'_Good,' _Ramirez said._ 'Ted, get the car ready. We're gonna head south. I hear Mexico is glorious this time of year.'_

The four exchanged significant glances as they realised the implications of that sentence.

'Why does no-one ever go to Canada?' Deeks asked thoughtfully.

The other three shushed him.

'_Lovely,' _Tane said._ 'What about me?'_

'_Oh, right,' _Ramirez said._ 'Your money. Definitely enough to get you out of the country and set you up somewhere else.' _There was a thud, as if something was thrown and caught._ 'Those NCIS agents you told me about before. How much do they know?'_

'_Not enough.'_

'_Good, good.'_

There was silence for almost a minute, and then they heard a familiar sound. A gun being drawn out of a holster very, very slowly.

'_You've taken three years of my life, Ramirez.' _The voice they heard was so unfiltered in its fury that they almost didn't recognise it. _'And now I plan to take yours in return.' He pulled the safety catch off of the gun._

Ramirez chuckled._ 'You think that's wise, boy?'_

'_Very.'_

The next thing they heard was a gunshot and a crack, as if Tane had fallen to the floor.

'_Goodbye, son. You were nothing but a pawn in a big, complicated game. You were nothing but disposable trash.'_ And then the recording dropped out.

'He recorded his own death so that we could prosecute Ramirez.' Callen shook his head in part sadness, part admiration.

'And he got Ramirez to admit that this was premeditated, too,' Deeks said, slipping into lawyer mode. 'That qualifies for special circumstances.'

'That scum doesn't deserve the needle,' Kensi spat. 'He deserves to rot.'

'We all think that,' Sam said, 'but we have to find him in order to let him rot.'

Suddenly, Callen's phone rang. He stripped his hand of the bloody glove and pulled the phone out of his pocket. He tapped the screen.

'Go, Eric.'

'Okay, I've got Ramirez leaving the house seven and a half minutes ago on the traffic camera down the street,' Eric said.

'Great, where is he _now_, Eric?' Callen asked.

'I've got no clue about which direction he's going in, so it's kind of hard-'

'Mexico, Eric. Look at everything south of here,' Kensi cut him off.

'Oh,' Eric said in surprise. 'I'll get back to you, then.' He hung up.

'We've got to go,' Kensi said. 'We can't let him get away with this.'

'Agreed,' Deeks muttered. 'That's three cops he's murdered. We've got his confession to Tane on tape. We've got Harvey. It's enough, isn't it?'

'You're the lawyer, you tell us,' Sam said.

'People have been prosecuted on a hell of a lot less,' Deeks said slowly.

Suddenly, Callen's phone rang again. 'Eric, tell me something good.'

'He just turned off onto the I-55,' Eric said. 'He's heading to Mexico.'

'Okay, Eric, we're on our way.'

…

**Now, those of you that have actually been reading and following the song lyrics at the top of each update might have realised that the next chapter is gonna be the last one, so make sure you review this chapter lots, or purple plot hippo might decide that Ramirez gets away… or worse…**

**XD PurpleHipposRock**


	20. Chapter 20

**The Ballad Of Mona Lisa**

**Chapter 20**

**For the last time ;( I don't own either NCIS: LA or 'The Ballad of Mona Lisa' by Panic! At The Disco**

…

'All those Naval officers,' Kensi sighed. 'And those NCIS agents.'

'All those lives,' Deeks sighed. 'He's gonna pay, right?'

'After everything he's done…'

'He hasn't just killed Navy people, you know,' Deeks said, looking at her.

'I know,' she replied. 'I went through those files with you. I saw that scar that he gave you. I want him too.'

'We all want him,' Callen said, his voice tinny and small through the Comms in their ears.

'Me more than you,' Deeks grumbled.

Kensi reached over and put a hand on his arm. 'Don't worry, Deeks. We won't let him get away.'

'I know,' Deeks said, gripping the steering wheel so firmly that the skin over his knuckles went white.

'You okay, Deeks?' Sam asked.

'I'll be better when we get this guy.'

'If we end up having to fight him, you can throw the first punch,' Callen offered.

'If I throw the first punch, I promise you, it will be the _last_ punch,' Deeks said, the unusually dark tone of his voice sending shivers up Kensi's spine.

'Then we won't let you punch him,' Kensi said simply. 'After all, he might punch back.'

'And we can't let him hurt that pretty face of yours,' Sam said teasingly, realising what Kensi was trying to do.

'Kensi might ask for another partner. After all, your face must be the only reason why she keeps you around,' Callen joked.

'Oh, is that it?' Deeks asked. 'What's your excuse, Callen?'

Kensi hid a smile while Sam let out an audibly amused snort.

'I see you smiling, Kensi,' Deeks said, narrowing his eyes and lowering his eyebrows. 'Don't deny it.'

She shook her head and let the smile flower full bloom while Callen sighed.

'Okay, guys, I've got vision of Ramirez, or at least, I've got his car,' Eric said, his voice thin through the tiny speakers of the Comms.

'Is he _in_ the car, Eric?' Sam asked.

The mood of the team had switched immediately from quirky to serious, and Eric was always surprised by their ability to do this, even after all those years.

'Can't tell,' Eric said. 'The tinting's too dark.'

'Hmmm…' Deeks hummed.

'What's up?' Kensi asked her partner.

'I think I might have a plan.'

…

It was a beautiful day to be leaving California. Not a single cloud marred the perfectly blue sky, and the sun was shining high and bright. A perfect day to go to the beach – that was if he actually _went_ to the beach. No, instead he just dappled in murder, mayhem and his especial favourite – drugs. And he was headed to the world's drug capital, where he was sure that he would make even more of that wonderful money. He was gonna get _all_ the way to Mexico, where those damn Navy cops wouldn't be able to get him. True, Tane _had_ told him that they had nothing on him, but he hadn't trusted Tane as far as he could throw him, and that had been a wise decision considering that the innocent agent had turned on him and forced him to murder him.

Damn kid. He never should've pulled him in on that. Thought he was innocent; thought he was malleable; thought he was just gonna twist him around his little finger…

In Mexico, he won't make that mistake. Only the best – cut out the rest. That would be his new motto. It rhymed, it was catchy and best of all, it told the truth. And Theodore 'Teddy the Shredder' Ramirez liked cutting.

He reached over to the car's stereo controls and turned up the radio a little bit more, nodding slightly in time to the music. He glanced out the window – traffic was always a bitch, but today, this worked in his advantage. They'd never catch him in this sludge.

Suddenly, though, a siren sang out into the stifling mid-afternoon air. He groaned, and glanced into his rear-view mirror – yup, there was that tell-tale flash of red and blue on the front of a couple of cops on bikes.

'Damn,' he groaned, lightly whacking the steering-wheel. He knew he should've dumped the damn car. But it had cost so much, and it was such a nice one. He just couldn't convince himself to leave it behind to the cops' less than tender mercies, nor destroy it completely.

He signalled right, and pulled into a conveniently placed rest stop. Maybe this was just a misunderstanding – those Navy cops couldn't have a warrant out for his arrest this soon, could they? Maybe his plates were wrong; maybe a light was broken; just a simple mistake, they could fine him for money that he'd never pay, and they could all just get on with their day.

However… He reached over and took the pistol from the front passenger's seat, tucking it into the waistband of his pants. He could never be too careful, and if this _was_ going south, he wasn't going without a fight. In fact, he had plans that very clearly decreed that he wasn't going at all.

He hit the button on the arm rest which automatically wound down the window. 'Good afternoon, officer. Can I help you?' There was no call to be uncivil, at least at the moment.

'License and registration, please, and turn off the ignition.' The cop lowered his reflector sunglasses and blinked at him with rather piercing blue eyes.

'I wasn't speeding, was I?' Ramirez asked, leaning over and taking the registration out of the glove box, all the while very carefully not revealing his weapon to the cop. It didn't seem as though the cop knew about his association with the recent murders, and he didn't want to risk that by being pulled in for an unregistered firearm.

'No, your speed was within quite legal limits,' Callen said, taking the registration from the man, avoiding brushing his hand as he did so.

'That's good,' Ramirez said, trying to avoid eye contact with Callen. 'So, what's up?'

'You are aware of the laws regarding window tinting, yes?' Callen asked.

Ramirez blinked. 'There are laws?' _That_ was all this was all about?

'I'm afraid that you can't have your windows that dark. They have to be light enough so that policemen such as me can identify who's behind the wheel, just in case the person behind the wheel is underage, or a wanted fugitive, or anything like that,' Callen said lightly, not missing how Ramirez tensed up at the word "fugitive".

'Oh, I had no clue,' Ramirez said innocently. He truly _hadn't_ any idea that it was illegal. 'I bought this car second-hand.'

'You haven't given me your license, sir,' Callen reminded him. 'And I don't suppose you can supply me with the person that sold you the car?'

'I could _try_ and remember,' Ramirez said slowly, reaching into his back pocket to retrieve his license from his wallet.

'Thank you, sir.' Callen took the license and handed it to the other cop who had been standing silently next to him. Sam took them and nodded at him before murmuring something into Callen's ear. Neither man missed Ramirez straining to hear what he said.

'Is everything okay?' Ramirez asked, really starting to get nervous now.

'Well, actually, uh, Mr Ramirez, my partner here noticed that you have a _bullet_ hole in the body of your car, right next to the left rear tail light.'

'Do I?' Ramirez asked. He hadn't noticed that.

Callen gave a chuckle. 'If I didn't know any better, I'd think that you got this car from a drug dealer or a gang banger, Mr Ramirez.'

Ramirez chuckled as well, playing along. 'Oh, no, I just live in a very _rough_ neighbourhood.'

'_Very_ rough,' Sam agreed, returning to his position next to Callen.

'So, officer, is there a fine, or something?' Ramirez asked.

'Well, actually, Mr Ramirez, we've hit something rather strange,' Callen said.

'You have?' Ramirez asked, his heart leaping into his throat. His hand inched closer to his weapon.

'I don't suppose you could step out of the car?' Callen asked.

'Oh, well, I…'

'Please, sir,' Sam said sternly. Even though he'd said the word, all the men present were aware that he wasn't requesting it.

'Okay…' He began to slowly reach for his pistol.

'Open the door from the outside, please,' Sam said, not missing the movement.

'O- okay,' Ramirez stammered, beginning to lose his cool.

'Thank you,' Callen said, tucking the door open the rest of the way.

Ramirez stepped out of the car.

'Are you feeling alright, sir?' Sam asked, noticing that Ramirez looked a little clammy.

'It's very warm,' Ramirez noted.

'Very warm,' Callen agreed. 'Wouldn't you say that it was warm?' he asked, turning to Sam.

'Very warm,' Sam agreed dutifully.

'Officer, can I ask what is going on, here?' Ramirez asked as a silver SUV pulled into the rest area behind them.

The doors of the car opened and two people got out, a man and a woman. The woman slammed the passenger door closed.

'Oh, come on, Fern, seriously, you can't stay mad at me forever,' the man said pleadingly, closing his door considerably more gently.

'I can and will,' the woman snapped back.

'What did I do?' the man asked, widening his eyes and giving her a look that under any other circumstances would have absolutely melted her.

'You were _flirting_ with her,' she answered. 'I was standing right there.'

'What? I'm not _tied_ to you,' he replied.

'Sometimes, it feels like it.' She stalked off to the bathroom.

'Princess…' He followed her.

Ramirez's eyes widened, recognising the man as one Detective Marty Deeks of the Los Angeles Police Department. He _should've_ died. A pity, really. He had actually been pretty good, had had him fooled for a while there.

Stuff going free. This opportunity was way better. Today, Dt. Deeks was going to die.

'I… I think I need to use the bathroom,' Ramirez said, noting as Deeks slipped into the men's room.

'Would that be a problem, Officer Hanna?' Callen asked Sam.

'No problem at all. I'm still waiting to hear back from base,' Sam replied.

'Come on, Mr Ramirez,' Callen said. 'I'll escort you.'

Ramirez nodded, not protesting after feeling the reassuring weight of his pistol at his waist. The cop wasn't armed, and by the looks of it, neither was Deeks.

He moved into the shade of the bathroom, where Deeks was using the urinal. He grunted and moved to the taps where he splashed slightly warm water onto his face.

'Warm, ain't it?' Deeks said conversationally to Callen.

'Very,' Callen replied from Ramirez's side.

'Say, Mister, you feeling alright? You look like you need a drink,' Deeks said to Ramirez.

'Now, that would be good, but you know what would be better?' Ramirez asked, looking at the either dumb or amnesia-affected detective.

'Not a clue,' Deeks replied.

'Your death.' Without warning, Ramirez whipped out his weapon and pistol-whipped Callen across the face, who fell unconscious to the floor, before pouncing on Deeks.

'Not likely, Ramirez,' Deeks grunted, taking a slug to the face as he knocked Ramirez's weapon out of his hand.

'You should've died, Deeks.'

Deeks kicked him in the shin as his opponent's hands closed around his throat.

'But lookie here, I didn't,' Deeks gasped, struggling against him.

They struggled viciously, silently, until the silence was broken by the click of a gun.

'You wanna put my partner down very_, very_ slowly,' Kensi said, pressing the muzzled of the weapon into the back of Ramirez's skull. 'Because at this range, I can't see myself missing.'

'You never miss, Fern,' Deeks coughed out as Ramirez released his hold on Deeks.

'_Don't_ call me Fern,' Kensi warned. 'Or those won't be the only injuries you get today.'

Deeks smiled sunnily at Ramirez. 'She's real kinky.'

'Shut _up_ Deeks,' Kensi said.

There was a chuckle, and Sam joined them in the bathroom. 'I assume by that that everything's okay in here?'

'Oh, yeah, peachy,' Deeks said. 'Other than someone trying to kill me _again_.'

'I got _pistol whipped_,' Callen reminded him, taking Sam's hand and allowing himself to be pulled up.

'You guys always did say that you'd be pistol-whipped rather than kicked in the nuts,' Kensi said.

'That is true,' Deeks said. 'You guys got cuffs?'

Callen pulled a pair out of his back pocket. 'You wanna do the honours, Deeks?'

'Yes please,' Deeks said, taking them. 'After all, there's nothing I like more than poetic justice.' He snapped the cold steel around Ramirez's wrists.

'You son of a bitch, Deeks,' Ramirez spat.

'Ew,' Kensi said, wiping spittle off of her arm.

'He just insulted both _you_ and my mother,' Deeks said, looking at Kensi. 'I'm not sure which I want to avenge first.'

'How about neither?' Kensi suggested. 'Just read him his rights.'

'Good idea,' Callen said.

'Very good,' Deeks agreed. 'You are under arrest for the assault of a federal agent, the attempted murder of a policeman, the attempted murder of Agent Amy Carlson, the murder of Agent Daniel Tane and finally, the murder of Agent Sara Murphy.'

'You just love saying that, don't you?' Sam asked.

'You wouldn't believe how long I've waited to say that.'

'We probably can,' Callen said.

Deeks shrugged and nudged Ramirez in the back, picking up his pistol and tucking it into his waistband on the way out of the bathroom. 'Come on, buddy. Nothing but jail for you… You'll be awfully popular there, won't you?'

Ramirez grunted, and the team smiled at each other.

'_There's nothing wrong with just a taste of what you paid for...'_

_The End_

…

**And… we're done. Sigh… I'm sad. Oh, well.**

**Thanks to everyone who reviewed, especially lastnameleft and supernaturallover101, who encouraged me from the very start. I hope that everyone who read it enjoyed this story.**

**Now, just that it's ended, doesn't mean that you shouldn't review. Especially because I'm starting work on a sequel, and I'd love to hear whether anyone will actually read it…**

**It's another Panic! At The Disco song; "I Write Sins Not Tragedies". Look out for it. Can't wait to see you there!**

**XD PurpleHipposRock**


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